Ep 525 - The Magic Bullet Solution Myth

Speaker 1

Are you ready, ready to release internal pain to find confidence, clarity and direction for your future, to live a life of meaning, fulfillment and contribution to trust your intuition again, but something's been holding you back, you've come to the right place. Welcome. I'm Ian Hawkins, the host and founder of The Grief Code podcast. Together, let's heal your unresolved or unknown grief by unlocking your grief code. As you tune into each episode, you will receive insight into your own grief, how to eliminate it, and what to do next. Before we start by one request, if any new insights or awareness land with you during this episode, please send me an email at info at the and Hawkins coaching.com. And let me know what you found. I know the power of this word, I love to hear the impact these conversations have. Okay, let's get into it. I see too many people looking for the magic bullet solution, that one big thing that's going to completely transform their life. And I see way too many people try to sell this magic bullet solution. This is the solution, this is the thing that will get you by whereas really, self mastery takes incremental steps. And sustainable change requires requires incremental steps change over time. Because a magic bullet generally is avoiding what really needs to be known. You make a big change really quickly. The example I often use is people looking to lose weight quickly and they go on a fad diet and they shed a heap of weight, but they haven't changed any habits so their weight slowly goes back on. And it's the same with whenever you're trying to improve at the moment. If you continue to look for the magic bullet for that quick solution, it's actually going to keep you stuck. Because one, you'll always be looking for the next magic bullet. And also you're you're thinking that it's just going to be one decision that's going to change your life or the reality is that it's takes a number of small decisions, not these big life changing ones. Because even the big life changing decisions that feel like a big decision, then require a whole lot of micro decisions after that, to be actually get whatever it is that you've decided on, locked into place, and moving forward in the way that you want it to. Because if you look at like a big decision, maybe you're going to move to a whole new place, you're going to change jobs. Well, it really is it that you make that change, and then everything works out, that usually opens up a whole lot more questions, a whole lot more steps. And it's your ability to continue to take on those steps to be able to continue to make the changes required, which will allow you to have the life that you want. And importantly, to be able to unleash your infinite potential, because you do have so much more potential and that getting to that point only happens by commitment to the ongoing work, the commitment to continue to address anything else that needs addressing. It's not from this one defining decision that will change everything. You have enough defining moments that are outside of your control, without trying to add in these mythical ones that don't exist anyway. It is important though, to be decisive, because like I said, those small decisions. They're not as big as we make out them to make them out to be. And even some of those bigger decisions aren't as well. Because they're just the next step to the next step to the next step. We're working with someone last year that had a big decision around whether we're going to live and change of job was a relocation and they sat on that decision for so long. And ultimately it was helping him to see that will either decision is going to be a decision that's going to work and actually acting on it. Instead of being in this holding pattern to see you and he may was trying new city in this new role. Things didn't work out and he was able to make another decision to be able to come back ended up in a new job, a more fulfilling job a better paying job and back in the same location he was in the first place that I could have dragged on for years if he procrastinated not being sure looked back and thought ah, what if what if what if, but instead he He got clarity enough to be able to take the action and be able to take the steps and then readjust as he needed to. It's so much more important to be decisive. Keep taking those smallest steps, sometimes we have to be navigated around an obstacle. And our unconscious is is very good at that. So the more detail we can get our unconscious will take us forward, we'll be inspired to take certain steps. The key part is then being decisive acting on it and on our unconscious while our conscious mind to get on board, and we'll navigate around what was keeping us stuck and come out the other side. So making sure that you remind yourself that one big decision doesn't define you. one magic bullet solution is not going to be the answer. And instead incremental steps slight edge approach. That metaphor in the in the slight edge book by Jeff Olson, where he talks about the water heist of that takes 100 days to cover a full pond with the water the water lilies. Day 50 might see one or two lilies. Day 90, you might see like a small grouping of water lilies that might be the size of a mattress, but come day 100 It's completely covered because it takes time to grow beneath the surface. So if you treat your next 100 days love that your next year, whatever it is, keep making those little steps, those little changes those little improvements, and the evidence won't be there for you to see straightaway. But at some point in the future, suddenly you'll see everything started to unfold because you've done the work and you've continued to move forward. You've got the results. reminder, if you haven't already, jump on to the Self Mastery website, subscribe, or whatever, whatever on the platform you listen to whatever it is, whether it's a subscribe button, the like button, whatever it is. So you make sure that when those new episodes kick off the new year that you're ready to go, and you'll be able to keep hearing these messages from me and these awesome interviews with wonderful people that I share with you as well. Have an awesome day. Speak to you soon. I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Grief Code podcast. Thank you so much for listening. Please share it with a friend or family member that you know would benefit from hearing it too. If you are truly ready to heal your unresolved or unknown grief, let's chat. Email me at info at Ian Hawkins coaching.com You can also stay connected with me by joining the Grief Code community at Ian Hawkins coaching.com forward slash The Grief Code and remember, so that I can help even more people to heal. Please subscribe and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform