Ain’t That the Truth! How Discovering Our Inner Truth is not a Straight Path

This is When Spirit Calls and you on your journey are in the right place. This show is about magic miracles and meaning shared through stories, interviews and channeled messages. We have so much to share about who you are and your divine mission here on the earth. Let's get to it When Spirit Calls is right now.

Our guest Chantel White is known for her horse partnered and grounded Country Girl guidance. She loves removing the BS stories that keep heart centered souls stuck in abusive relationships, guilt, shame and self criticism. She is passionate about supporting her clients to stand firmly in their truth worth and value and to create healthy boundaries. Her message is simple, not necessarily easy, but it is to stay true to who you are and everything will work out. Chantel is a certified equine Gestalt coach, a Kashuk, records practitioner, author, truth seeker, and authentic happiness guide. She has been helping people find their truth and heal old stuck patterns and trauma for over a decade. And her work has been featured on CTV CF CW and CBC. Please join me in welcoming our guest today Chantel white.

Hello, everybody. Welcome back to when Spirit calls. As you heard, I have a lovely guest today. Her name is Chantel Hi, Chantel.

Hi, DeeAnne. Hi, everybody who's listening.

I'm so happy you're here. You know, you and I have been in each other's circles for quite a few years. And I feel so blessed to have watched you do some of your work and the people that you've helped. I have a personal friend of mine who has gone on this incredible journey because of you. And so you know, I just feel like you're such a such an inspiration to so many people. And I really want to allow people to get to know who you are and how special you are. So can you start us off with just telling us a little bit about your story? How did you become an equine Gestalt coach? How did you step into your role as the country grow coach to help people understand who they are and what the heck they're doing here. So I'd love to hear that from you.

Absolutely. You know, looking back over it, it's obviously because I didn't know who I was, it was trying to discover it along the way. But what led me into the equine Gestalt coaching world was that I've always loved horses, I was one of those people who I'm pretty sure I was born with a love for horses. And always always wanted to be around them, but also always wanted to help others. And I'm sure a lot of people who are listening to this who are heart center, you know, always felt compelled to help others. And so I went on my journey, it was shortly after my youngest went to school. And I just felt that hurt tug. That pull of like, there's something more for me out there. And I'm here to do more. And so actually researched for like two years, because there's a lot of Equine Assisted programs out there, but none of them felt like the right fit. And then I found the equine good Gestalt coaching method. And I signed up without even talking to the mentor, you know, I tend to do a lot of those things. Like I like, think about it too much. And then I'm like, Okay, I'm gonna do it. So yeah, I signed up for that. And that was in 2011. So it's a while ago now. And then I started doing the equine Gestalt coaching with people. And as they healed, and I worked with them on their stuff, so did I. And it was interesting, because looking back, of course, you can always see things more clearly. I didn't realize the place I was in. I was in a very, you know, my story, I was in a very toxic abusive relationship. And because it was so covert, and hard to grasp, I never really realized it. And it wasn't until I started doing my own personal work, plus working with others, that I started to see it more clearly like I was in such denial. Yes. Yeah. Like,

can I pause on that? For sure. Because I I've been there too, where it's like, we don't want to admit that what we're experiencing isn't okay. Yeah. And it's almost like that cognitive dissonance, right, the cognitive bias sense is we want to, we want to believe what we believe. We don't want to be challenged by that. Because it's scary to think that there's a whole nother reality or a whole nother truth for us. And so sometimes what happens is we anchor in instead of, right, we're like, No, this is this is, this is the way it is. And this is normal. And this is the truth. Right? So I wanted to share that because I think a lot of people and myself included, we get so caught up in that, well, no, this is the way this is, this is how it's supposed to be or this is how it is for everybody. You know, and then we close ourselves off to really what is possible.

It's true, like we we really get caught up in what we think is our reality. Mm hmm. And I did that I, you know, it wasn't really bad. But then there was there was a time where I was starting to be aware of it. And I kept shutting it off and closing it down and not listening to my gut not listening to my intuition and just kept, it was almost like a cap like, oh, no, this person's not not that they're this. Like I had this definite idea in my head of them any Right, right. Yeah. And so it did keep me stuck for like, over a decade.

Yeah, really started decades. Yeah. So those of you listening that are feeling stuck, and maybe even feeling stuck for a while? Don't feel bad? Yeah. And none of us should feel bad. I mean, no wonder we stay in those environments. It's because we don't we don't realize that there's a much bigger picture. We don't realize that we're lying to ourselves. We there's a lot of things we don't see in that process.

All Absolutely. And in particular, in situations that may be toxic or abusive, because that's part of the the cognitive dissonance as you say, it's like you're in a cloud, you're in a fog, and you can't see clearly, like, I just had a client not too long ago. And I do work with a lot of people, women who have been in abuse or are trying to get out of their abusive situation. Some of them don't even know they're in it. Yeah. You know, like we talked about, and it took about six session, but but she finally got there. And it was like, she looked back. She's like, it's been this way the whole time. I never seen it, you know, and I think we all go through that. So we have to give ourselves grace in those moments right now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I know, it was. You know, I have so many profound moments along the way. But there was, there was a time where I just couldn't take it anymore.

Yeah. You know, and I, that discomfort became enough that it was the catalyst that said, Okay, it's too uncomfortable for me now. Yeah, yeah,

I was done denying, you know, it was like, all that fighting. I was going on within within myself. I'm like, Okay, wait a minute. This is actually what's happening. And it's not okay. And so, yeah, I remember that distinctly. The note I left on the table is like, not one more second, one more minute, one more day? Well, I put up with this. And it might, you know, like, I want to go back to like, I could make that all about him. It was really about me, what was I putting up with?

Yes, yes. Yeah, this I love that you said that. Because I think that we compromise our own value and our own integrity and our own boundaries for the sake of others. And so sometimes what happens as well as we also don't want to admit that reality that this isn't healthy, because we don't want to fess up that we're the ones that allowed it to happen. And it's not our slang. You know, that's not we're not talking about blame here. But we are talking about recognizing that a lot of times we're actually angry at ourselves, right, actually resentful towards ourselves, because Oh, my gosh, I've been in this relationship and I keep putting up with it. You know, what's wrong with me? This isn't about what's wrong with us, but it is about us taking responsibility for how we're showing up and our role in how we've contributed and allowed certain things to unfold.

Yeah, absolutely. You know, because there's a time where it's very appropriate to hold space and compassion for the victim within ourselves, because we have been victimized, you know, and then when you can become somebody who forgives yourself, and let yourself go and says, Hey, that was part of my journey, and look how much I learned. Then you can step out of that and like you said, Take That self responsibility, not in a way of blame but in a way of empowering yourself. Hey, Hey, I can make better choices now because I no different.

Yes. Oh, I love that also reminds me of the energy of no wonder which I speak about from time to time to say No wonder I stayed in that relationship for this. No wonder I wanted it to work. No wonder, you know, no wonder. So again, that brings that extra grace, like you talked about to ourselves or that compassion towards ourselves, so that we're not beating ourselves up through the process, we already had the beating up enough in the relay. Exactly. So now we get to come out of that and give ourselves the grace and say, Oh, look at when I got out of this, look at how much I learned, look at how strong I am. And come into that empowerment piece. As you said, I love that.

Absolutely. And that does bring out a key point too, you know, I've often I know I went through it and you know, I still I still go back there as a as a habit I have to catch myself is that blame and shame. And that guilt and all of those heavy things that no longer serve? Right and when you can actually tap into the the truth of it all. It's, it's, that's not who you were, you know, it was just you were doing the best you could at the time. And that you gotta let that binning stick go because often, you know, people who have been in abuse or or in a toxic situation, they take that, that stick with them that is coming along, and they take it along for a ride, and it's like, hey, wait a minute. I don't I don't need this anymore.

Yes. Yeah. So brilliant. So do you think that you taking your equine therapy? Do you think that that helps you to discover your truth? And by the way, we should probably explain what equine Gestalt therapy is. Yeah. Because I just have this like, Well, does everybody know that? Probably not. So can you tell us what that modality is what that looks like? And then back to the first question of do you think that that really contributed to you finding your inner truth and your inner voice?

Absolutely. Yeah. So equine Gestalt coaching is a really incredible method. Of course, I'm saying that because I do it. But I believe so wholeheartedly in it, like when I find need some healing, I go to my colleagues, I just I love it so much. So it is about part of partnering with horses in partnering with them in a way that we are honoring their their gifts and their abilities to help people heal. They're so intuitive, and they're so in tune with our energy and what has happened to us that they actually help us get to that place. Wow. Yeah, you know, because we all have things that baggage that we carry with us, you know, whether it's trauma, or whatever it is that we went through in our life, and we carry it forward with us, sometimes without even knowing. Right, and the horses can show that so quickly. In a way it's not judgmental, that's not, you know, feeling harsh, like, you know, you've just got like, your head smacked. It's, it's just like, oh, there that is yes, that that is something that I'm dealing with right now. And they can bring you to such a deep, rich, present moment, within ourselves that you can, yeah, you can really, really work through it, you know, just Dalton itself is an experience. And I've learned over the years, most traumas too, right. And so by using an experiential way of working through things, rather than just sitting and talking, you can walk through it in a different way. And again, bring in that self compassion piece and that grace piece for yourself. I love this. So versus Yeah, I could go on and on and on about them. I've I've learned throughout that to body somatic guidance is really something I'm very good at. And so tuning into people's bodies and what their body is sharing about what they're carrying around. Just helps unlock it and bring it to the surface to be looked at and dealt with and how much clearer is it than then doing it with a horse? You know, that you're that's the thing that they feel such a beautiful space? And they are? Yeah, go ahead.

That's the thing I love about this is that it gives us this other opportunity to grow and to heal without the traditional talk therapy and I'm not saying there's anything wrong with talk therapy per se, but it does give people this opportunity to do it a little bit differently. So the people that are you know, if it's if talk therapy is not working for you, working with the animals, and specifically the horses with equine therapy is like it's such a it's such a game changer. Because like you said it's this whole different energetic experience with these beautiful divine You know, beings. So I think it's really profound. And I've had the luxury of being around your horses and feeling that and I've always found horses to be very majestic. And, and so just being in their presence, I find very healing, but you get to add extra layers to that and move energy and dig deeper alongside of the horses, which is a magical magical process,

it really is. Yeah, and the Gestalt pieces is something that is amazing because it does bring the wholeness or completion to all that unfinished stuff that we carry around. So it's just it is really magical piecing them together. And overall, what it does is it brings us back to our authentic self, or, you know, our unconditioned self, however, you want to see that. And so, for me, that's what it did. I was very, very conditioned. And I'm sure a lot of listeners can relate to this. Being self sacrificing, and not having boundaries and caring about everybody else, and believing the best in everyone else. And forgetting about myself, I was conditioned to, you know, even society, you know, that, that if I was a married woman, I was more important than if somebody who wasn't so then I had to stay with that, you know, I was conditioned to, you know, tell death, do you part, all of those things. And so, in order to, you know, grow through that I had to I had to really look at all of that and say, Is that really true for me? Is that true for me? Is that really what I believe? Or is that just something I've brought with me? Well, my childhood and to my condition, self. And so once I started becoming more authentic, confident, and knowing what I wanted, that's when my relationship started breaking apart. Right? Right. Of course, before I was very complacent.

I was just gonna say you were doing everything he needed you to do and obey, or whatever else that looked like, yeah. So for him, he could he could walk on you. He could do whatever, right? Yes, do it because of course, you were pleasing and serving and sacrificing yourself.

Well, yeah. I mean, it worked well, for him. Time. Yeah. You know, and to me, I don't even hold any grudges on him or me for that moment. It was what was necessary to grow, you know. But yeah, that doing that personal work, that deep personal work, I was able to find my authentic self and more than anything, my gifts I didn't even know, you know, at the time, it's so crazy to look at what an empath was, I didn't know what that was. All I knew was I was sick every time I went around people who were sick, and that I pick up on people's headaches, or if somebody was angry, I was feeling the anger. And, you know, it just was never really in my body. Wow, you know, everybody else got to the, you know, all their energy was affecting me. And then when I learned that, and then learned how to tune into that as a gift, and that, you know, I was here to follow my intuition and soul that completely transformed the way I seen my life.

Wow. So would you say that spirit called you to take the training?

Oh, absolutely. Hands down? Yes.

Yeah. And look at the path that led you on, right, that path of self confidence and inner truth. And then, even though it resulted in the ending of the marriage, it was a positive experience for you, and that you were like, Oh, my gosh, I know what I'm worth now. And I can see and now I get to design this life that I want for myself. Absolutely. Beautiful. So, okay, well, let's talk about this aspect of our authentic truth. Because I think this truth is a topic of hot conversation these days. Because, you know, we had COVID that brought up a lot of, okay, stuff, you know, existed, a lot of people went through this whole process of self realization of like, oh, maybe I'm not doing what I'm supposed to do, and what's the purpose and what's my meaning in life? So, what are some of the things that we need to know if we are wanting to discover deeper aspects of ourselves, like aside from going and taking, you know, horse crystal training with you? Yeah. What, what are some of the things that we can be doing in our lives that can help us to come into deeper truth within ourselves?

Absolutely. I think one of the biggest tools is is tuning into your body. Mm hmm. Your body doesn't lie. Mm hmm. You know, you can say or not anxious about something, but if you ask your body, it's like, no, I mean, I'm anxious. So then what is that anxious feeling telling you? You know, like doing Some exploration of how your body really feels about that. Because that actually, to me is our compass for our spirit. And you know, if we would learn to start tuning into that of our truth, so how is my body feeling about this? You know, my guts twisted knots. Okay, so what is my gut saying about this like? And so our truth is definitely about accessing what our body is sharing with us at that moment. You know, and it could be, it could be obviously, it can be trauma and stuff like that. But if we, we start listening to it, we can understand it further.

I love this one, because I think that we have quite a disconnect with our physical bodies. Yes. And, you know, I had to learn through my health journey because I was so sick, you know, most of my life, that my body wasn't a burden to be cared for. And yet for most of my life was like, oh, man, I have to go to bed. I mean, I have to eat, I have to drink water. I've eat healthy, like all the things that felt like a burden. But as soon as I shifted that, then my body started to say, Okay, let's, let's figure this out. Let's build a relationship. So it really comes back to building that relationship with your physical body. You know, and, and so I love that because you're right, the body's telling us all sorts of things right? All the time. Yeah, I, you know, I just have to share the story, because it's kind of funny, but I had gotten like, the kids wanted McDonald's. So I made an accent and got some McDonald's and I ordered myself a burger as well. Well, I went and put the burger in my mouth. And I literally was like, my body. Like, coughed it back out. My body was like, no. So the burger went in the garbage. Oh, good for you. Yeah. So I didn't force myself. I was like, my body's telling me something. But How often have I swallowed that even though my body was telling me it didn't really want it. And then I reaped the consequence of the tummy ache, or whatever else came after that. And I think this happens to a lot of us where we, we're not doing a check in with our body, and then all of a sudden, we've got a rash, or we've got pain. And that's like, the body's final kick at the can to say, Hey, you're not listening to me. You know, again, I'm paying attention. Right? And so this is not just from a discovering our deeper truth, but from a standpoint of being healthier, and honoring the body. Absolutely know, intuitively letting our body guide us a little bit more. So I love that. Yes.

You know, like, I think back in my situation, of course, you know, I'm pretty stubborn. Maybe some people can resonate with that, you know, I'm pretty stubborn. I got a lot of messages along the way that I ignored. Yeah, um, I got plantar fasciitis. I got a compressed disc in my back. All these things, you know, that my body was screaming at me, like, hey, like, listen, pay attention to what's going on here?

Oh, I feel you because I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and a slew of other things as well. So yeah, it's so tuned into the body. So that's one of the first things in discovering our deeper truth. Yes,

Absolutely.

What else you got? What else do we need?

Well, do you know? Um, this kind of it just go along with tuning into the body, but it's more about your energy field, you know? So like, what is your yes and your No, so for me, when I'm asking if I should go one direction or another direction, you know, like finding my truth in situation? Is this true for me? You know, even asking yourself, Is this true for me? So often, we don't even ask, we just don't even question it is like, oh, that's somebody else's truth. So it must be my own.

Aha. You know,

so for me, truth feels light. feels lighter. Right, you know, and, and things that are not true for me or that feel like a lie. Yeah. They're heavy. So just even getting into that feeling of of does this feel lighter? Does this feel heavy for me?

Yes. You know, I also asked the question, Is this mine? Yes. Like when I woke up with anxiety the other morning and I said, Is this mine? And right away? It's like the anxiety figured away It wasn't even mine. Right? Yeah. So yeah, adding to that I really, I love that because I think that so often, we get bombarded by all this other energy, right? And we're feeding ourselves it whether it's the news, or we're listening to stuff or we're scrolling on social media, we get fed all of this other energy, and then we get confused by it, right? Because now it's floating around here. And it's like, Oh, what is my truth? I don't know. We have here away some of that. off, don't we?

Yeah, we definitely do. And and Yeah, and so then it is so you know it, then it goes to the question of what is this true for me? Is this really true? And if it is, because you have a right to personal truth, and I think that's where a lot of women in particular, but I know men struggle with this too, is like, owning it knowing that you have a right to your truth. You know, we have our spiritual truth. Yeah, which is wonderful, too bad. We don't tune into that more often. But you know, if your truth is like, you know, I came to one, and you know, about this Deann like, that I was having a horrible year last year. You know what, I'm still coming out of it. And all of a sudden, it's like, okay, so what is going on with me, you know, doing those further explorations of what? Why am I feeling so sunk? Why am I not able to move forward? Asking yourself the questions and be being open to the answer, however, you get it? Yeah. And mine came with, you know, I have is often get auditory messages. And it was like, It's shame. Oh, hey, it's shame. Now I could say, you know, as a coach, and somebody who helps heal others, no, I don't have shame. Well, that doesn't help me heal it. It doesn't help me expose it. It does not.

does not help.

Yeah. Doesn't never helps. Though, it's such a go to response, isn't it? Well, if I deny it, or put my blinders on, stop it away. Yeah, so even just asking the question, you know, and being open to the answer that you receive within yourself, it's about tuning in. Yeah, the truth is in you and within you. It's not from outside of you. Yes. I think so often, we're searching outside of ourselves.

We are yes, yeah. Yes, I think most people are right, you know, what that person says, and what that person says, and what that person says, but we know, we have the innate knowing and wisdom we were built for this. And if we really want to get to the nitty gritty, you know, in metaphysics, we have the false self, which is, you know, that physical, more of our three dimensional aspect of ourselves, self that we think we know or believe and then forgot self or our true self. Yes. And when we come into that space, like you said, the truth is lighter, our true self is lighter, it is divine, it is this infinite channel of wisdom and information. And so leaning into that aspect of our being in our knowing that is basically what you're inviting us to do here, I think, is really lean into that, that absolutely, yes, of our own inner truth, and then being willing to trust our own inner truth. And the other piece of this, of course, is that we're all discovering different aspects of our own truth, right? I mean, it's taken me years, like 40 plus years to discover certain things about myself that I'm like, wow, I should have had that figured out, you know, but identically. But it was this deeper layer of truth that I wasn't ready to see just yet. So we're almost healing back the layers. I think that this is part of our journey is to keep understanding deeper truths of ourselves.

Yes, absolutely. And allowing it to change, you know, yes, I have gotten so stuck in one way of thinking or doing or being and it's like, hey, wait a minute. That was true for me then. But is it true for me now? Oh, good. I love like it's, it might choose now is not the same as it was last year.

Exactly. I love that you brought that up? Chantelle, because I think that's really important. Our truth changes like us as we evolve as we shift our vibrational frequency, our truths, varying levels of our truth change, too. So a year ago, your truth might have been one thing, and now that truth is another thing. And so we have to be willing to be open to discovering those deeper aspects of new truths for ourselves as we evolve and come into deeper states of consciousness. I love that. Thank you for brass. Yeah,

yeah, me too. I just love being able to allow you know the truth to unfold rather than fighting it. Now, if we could get there earlier, if I could have got there earlier, it would have been wonderful, you know, but it's still it's part of the journey. I think it's a part of our journey here in this life. Absolutely. It is. Yeah, yeah. And so yeah, sometimes we have to expose the truth of the false self so that we can go oh, wait a minute. Hey. So my shame story is what was my shame story at the time? I think I was like unlovable. I think that was what it was like I was just not going to find Love and I was unlovable. And then I was like, okay, like, yeah, the truth is I'm feeling that way. And that's my shame story. But is that really the truth?

Right? Yes.

Is it really and like, so then you can question it. Right? And even if you feel that way at the time, you know, it's it's good to expose it and say, Okay, well, you know, where did this come from? Even? Where did this come from? For me? Because it's not often yours. Like you said, going back to that question, even energetically, this is mine.

Right? From Yeah. And some of us carry stuff from other people, other ancestors that we've had times even right. Yes. So I love that piece. Now, what about someone who feels like, they can't trust themselves authentically, or they can't trust their own wisdom? You know, if they're struggling to do that, is there anything we can do to like, help them build their trust in themselves?

I'm actually working with a client on this right now. And while with a few of them, I'm actually it's funny, you say trust, because that's what my group circle is going to be out at both at the end of this month is trust. Oh, you know, I think when we've been through trauma, or whatever it does, cause the cannot trust herself. Right? It really does. I think it's about finding, first of all the example examples of where you know what you knew, maybe you didn't listen, but you didn't know.

Ah, so evidence evidence actually did No, I love Yeah.

Because often people will look for the evidence. Oh, well, you know, this happens. So I shouldn't be able to trust myself. It's like, okay, but did you know that maybe you shouldn't went down that path? Oh, yeah. I kind of knew, Okay, so you can trust yourself. He didn't listen at that time. That's okay. Forgive yourself for that. But you can actually trust yourself.

I love that. Yeah, that in itself is so helpful. And I think the other piece comes back to really putting that ego mind in check. You know, that aspect of our logical mind that saying you don't know what you're talking about. And really just building that relationship and saying, Thanks, ego mind, but I've got this, which my listeners have probably heard me say in a few podcasts. Thanks, ego mind, but I've got this building that relationship. So that way that ego mind doesn't intercept so often, so that you can strengthen that trust. So it takes time for sure. Okay, I time is flown by so fast, we're gonna wrap up, but it has been so much fun. And I feel like this is a conversation that, you know, we could have time and time again, and keep peeling back the layers of it. Because I think that at the end of the day, we are all wanting to emerge more fully who we truly are. And so I thank you so much for being who you are, which by the way, you're very, very lovable.

Thank you, DeeAnne.

I know you know that now, but validating it. But really, you know, it's such a beautiful piece for all of us who are trying to understand deeper aspects of our truth, what is the truth for me, and, and really tuning into that. So that is brilliant, and I thank you for being here. Thanks, Doctor, what have you got for our listeners today?

Oh, I love doing

What do I have, I love doing belief busting sessions, I've been doing quite a few of them. And it's really, really well fun for me, but also very eye opening for people, you know, because as soon as they can kind of get to the belief, the core of that, you know, story, that denial that lie, then they're able to, you know, bring it to the lake. It just it changes it transforms. And so I love doing those. So it's 30 minutes with me on Zoom. And we get to really dig in to what is you know, maybe holding you back from stepping forward into your truth.

Yes. Oh, this is so good. And so this is a gift that you're giving our listeners. Yes, absolutely. I hope you guys take the time with Chantel. She's such a gift. And her time is such a precious gift. So thank you for that generous offer. I have a feeling I'm going to be sending some people your way to do some belief blasters. Chantel, this has been such a joy such a treat. We're going to put those links in the show notes, folks. So you should see that. Just below the podcast, you'll see the link to book your timing with Chantel and reach out to her. Chantel, thank you again for spending time today on When Spirit Calls.

Oh, it was amazing. Thank you, DeeAnne.

Oh, thank you so much was will be with all of you again next time until then. Pay attention notice when spirit is calling you in Hey, Thanks, everybody. Bye for now.

Bye.