Building Confidence EP10

Hello, my friends and welcome. You're listening to soul inspired decisions, a podcast for ordinary moms living extraordinary lives. My intention with this podcast is to teach, motivate and inspire by sharing stories, tools and strategies to help you unlock your greatest fears, annoying habits and old stories and make a move towards the things that have been on your heart. If you have been a little lost, or in a funk, and want to reconnect with your purpose, your passion and feel empowered again, then this is the best place for you to be hanging out. My name is Carrie liplay. And I'm an ordinary mom making extraordinary decisions. This is me putting one foot in front of the other, moving towards my next goal, and hoping to inspire you along the way. Let's get started. Welcome back to the one, Episode 10. building confidence, I have made it to 1010 episodes super exciting. This has been an incredible week for me, the universe is totally guiding me right now. And I love it. It's been a little bit of a lull lately, not knowing which direction I should have. But my clients right now are talking about manifesting and the things that are coming up. Jerry inspires me as I see the things aligning in their life. And it's so inspiring. Also, what's been happening this week, I was able to spend a whole day with a friend on the beach, just talking about our businesses, fears growth, and it was very much needed very much relaxing, and just be able to speak freely in all sides of business, then today, I had to take a load to the dump. So are we have a little truck that we haul garbage with. And it was full because my husband's been flying and unable to take care of this. So the trucks is stinky, it needs to go, me and my son took the load to the dump, we grab some ice cream. And in the meantime, he told me how to drive the truck. It's a standard and where to go at the dump because it wasn't doing it like that. But we made it through. He's four. So quite clearly he knows way more than I do. Of course, granted, I haven't been to the dump in a long time that I think I had it but it was a good thing he was that many of you know exactly what I'm talking about. The for y'all to know exactly what to say when they need to say it. Very smart. So after we grabbed some ice cream, we headed to crush SEO where I stumbled upon two of the most supportive women that have been with me on my journey. And while they're talking to me and lifting me up, I am trying to figure out what the universe is trying to tell me because there's two not one but two women there that are self supportive. And as I have been procrastinating, not that smoothly, but it tried to find a way around this podcasting stuff. And it's not just me talking, it's about me teaching and giving a lesson. And having the right information that I can give to you best support you. So it's not just something I feel I can just sit down and jam about. And maybe it will come to that as I do more. But these women are so full of energy, so full of light. And I'm here right now. And I just want to give a shout out to the three very supportive women that I've seen on this week, scene this week. And your inspiration means so much to me and your support. And I hope that this podcast will land with one of you and help you rise up wherever you need some competence or you need to move forward with something on your own journey. And I feel like my son's going to come barging through the store at any moment. That's what I feel undefined

I can be wrong, but Okay, so, topic today. Confidence, building competence. Now, I recently have spoken to a lady who simply just said, I wish I had more confidence. And how many of you can relate to this statement? Keep in mind, this is a mom in her late 30s saying she wishes she had more competence. How do we get to being an adult and still lack confidence? I do this I feel this. And I'm in my 40 so I don't know when it gets better or when it feels better or if it ever should feel better and maybe it shouldn't because No we're not. We're not growing. We're not changing And that confidence scares us because it's, we're moving towards something. So we talk about competence and what it means to you. I think this is an important topic for anyone, really from the ages of six to 75. We're all evolving, we're all changing. And we're all looking at someone like, I wish I had the confidence. If I had more confidence, what would it look like to you? What would it feel like to you take the best moments in your life and remember how you felt? That was confidence. You stood there, you smiled, you held your head up, you held your body up differently, you shook hands differently, you said hello differently. That confidence in the moment was so powerful that was truly you, in your core essence of what you were leading down in your life that moment. And then things shift and change. And we lose that depending who we're around what we're doing. Maybe we are at home. And as a mom, being home with my kids, I lost a lot of confidence. I felt like everything I'd ever learned in college, university, all the things was nothing. And I lost so much what I thought my life was built up around. So building that back up, again, has taken some hard work has taken a lot of deep diving and Shadow Work in other sorts of work. And I'm here to help you today to get you in a mindset of what is that confidence look like to you? Where do you need it? What does it need to show up? Confidence is knowing you can rely on yourself. It's the ability to believe in oneself, to choose the best path, or the best decision at the time and take action. What is the result you want to get from being more confident? When I chose to do Iron Man, it was the best decision at the time that I can make. I knew nothing about it. I didn't know how I was going to complete it. But I made a decision and I moved towards it. And that whole experience of my life made me more confident. If someone were to ask me about Ironman today, I would probably shrivel up and be like, Oh, it's just the thing I did. But in the moment, I can feel all the feelings of that 18 months of training and going through the process that was full on confidence, and then know what it feels like, know what it feels like to cross a line of a race that one of the greatest races in the world know that I did the work to get there. And the confidence behind that set me up for why I'm here today. So I know, there's little pieces of you that have that experience. They're not like mine, but they're different. Maybe it's the day you graduated from college or university or high school, maybe it's the day that you did a presentation at work, maybe it's the day you accepted a job interview, are making the best choices. We can at the time, and it doesn't matter what season you're in, your confidence comes behind those decisions that you're making. You can shift it, it's whether you walked or not. So whatever season you're in, competence is there if you're willing to try. And when we break this down of what area you're not confident, then that's the key. So what's holding you back? what's truly holding you back? Is it lacking in knowledge? Is it lacking in skill, or ability or talent, those four areas are areas that you can look at. And I'm guessing that if you're truly listening to this, the one that speaks to you the most has already popped into your head because I attract the people that are really in tune with their soul in their heart and it's just naturally there. That's your higher self coming through trying to help you out if you don't know what that is. That's your higher self trying to help you guide you to that one of those key things. So knowledge, skill, ability and talent. That's what you need to work on. That's the one area that you need to change yourself talk on. So is it for me on this podcast? The knowledge? I don't think so I don't think it's the knowledge at all. I have great knowledge. I study hard, I dive into things. I do the work is it skill.

I have a team who helps me so it shouldn't be skill. Maybe it's the ability or the talent to sit here and just chat or riff or maybe it's that that's part of that I don't have yet. I can stand in front of people and talk but to put a microphone In here, and habit being recorded. I just, it's so weird. So it's a growth mindset, I had to shift my mindset, what is it that I'm looking for? How am I going to build my own confidence around. Because other people seem to be getting something from what I'm hearing, just like when I listen to other people's podcasts, their seasons, where I love this group and that group and this person and what they're saying, and then seasons change, and then they don't resonate with me. But I may come back to them in six months, and somebody else does. That's what we're looking for is what resonates with us right now. I'm not better than anyone else, my information is not new. It's just in my own version, we're all teaching the same thing in our own version of life, and how we got through the hardest parts of our life to be able to teach and pursue and go after the things that we simply desire and love. And that's what's on our heart. And that's what truly comes out with us. And that will, what will come up for you, when you just take a step towards the thing that you're so afraid of doing or being people who are really willing to try and take risks, hit hard periods, when they doubt themselves. And they don't feel confident. And that confident comes and goes, the whole point of life is to grow. Or when we love a lot that some call it in personal development are tricky. stuff comes up, our old stuff comes up, our ship comes up, our fears come up, or doubts come up. And then we feel less competent. And we have to do the work around that. Because it's always going to come up. Once we let one thing go something new comes up and tries to block us. That's our ego. That's our devil. How would we want to look at it, that there's always things getting in our way. And I know I've said in a previous podcast, because I know it's something I'm very passionate about navigating. So let's do this right now. I love asking my audience, where are you right now with your competence on the thing that you want to move forward on? So on a scale of one to 1010, I am super confident one, I'm ready to quit. Where are you? Where are you on this competence scale?

And what's holding you back? Have you been feeling down uninspired, lack of motivation? To be completely transparent. My competence with this podcast is probably on the floor right now. When I first started this, eight months ago, this journey, it was like a 910. Like there was purpose meaning everything behind it. Everything just lined up perfectly. And it's like I get my own way. And I'm sure you guys can resonate with all this. What am I want to talk about? Well, that's already shifting. So I'm waffling on what I want to talk about, there's so much that I could talk about, and the things that I talk about with my friends that light me up and light them up of hearing. I should talk about that. But that's like manifesting is something that I love talking about. But is it Am I ready to talk about it yet? Because there's still so much rather There's still so I know, my husband calls it coincidence, I call it and that's okay that he can have his own opinion. And I can have mine but everything still comes together and aligns and so beautiful. And that the topic I love. So as much as I love teaching and motivations and motivational stuffing, goal setting and all the things that we that I have loved for

years, there is another whole side of me of my work that I do with my clients that is very soul driven, so aligned and soulful and quiet. And these, these women are just coming alive. And they feel more confident in their decisions and who they are. And it's so beautiful to see It's so inspiring to me to see how quickly things are shifting for people. So when we talk about competence, step one, the first thing being more confident, is decide, decide to be more confident. title of my pop cop, sorry, title of my podcast saw inspire decisions. Because I truly know the moment we decide.

The universe just lines up and guidance. And that's powerful in our confidence grows in our journey, whatever we're on in that season of life, and it's very powerful. So, so inspired decisions is on purpose because I think it's a key. And if you ask anyone their story of how they came to where they are now or how they got to that decision, the one key element in everything that Chips is the deciding factor of when they actually truly made the decision to go all in. You don't need 100 likes on social media, you don't need more people to tell you, you're amazing. You're awesome, you're smart, you're beautiful. You have to believe it yourself. Today, I'm going to stand taller and be more confident. Let's not overwhelm ourselves and say, for the rest of my life, I'm going to be more confident. Let's just look at today. So how can I be more confident today, just for one day, I'm going to be more competent. Keep saying it over and over in your head because that's where it starts. That's where we really loop the patterns in our brain. Because we know we negative self talk instantly, whenever we want to change something to be more positive. That is your intention for the day is to be more confident, and is more powerful. Behind create your day or your life. Walk around the house today. Being more confident walk down the street today. Being more confident Hold your head up high buck around, look at the street, the flowers and the trees, walk taller in the grocery store, look at somebody in the eye, say hello to them. talk to somebody new, try it. Of course it's uncomfortable. Anything new is uncomfortable. But that's how we grow. When you walk away. When you get back in your vehicle. When you get back home, it's done. You did it. The meeting that you're about to go into focus on the eye contact, focus on the handshake. You just decide today I'm going to be more confident. Step number two as a mom and a wife, teacher, partner, women, we have over 60,000 thoughts a day, and we

lose our train of thought, oh my god almost instantly, as soon as the kids come up, really. And the confidence thing goes out the door because we forget what we're supposed to be doing. So I love, love, love, love. Sticky Notes. And sticky notes are all over my house when I am focused on something new, something different. Sticky Note Hello, hello. And so many of you are tech savvy, like you just love the pop up things that come up on your phone, or you may call them. I'm not that tech savvy, but put it on your reminder on your phone, put it on your computer, your desktop screensaver and make a poster. This is what I'm targeting today, I'm going to be more competent, we have to see it. And as soon as we write it down, it's magical because pen to paper creates magic and rewriting the thing that we want. It's powerful and create intention, the moment you write it down the moment you say it. And then when you see it in the bathroom, when you see it beside the coffee machine, it reminds us that we're on track that yes, I need to do this, I need to practice this. We have to make change. And it's hard. And if we just say we're going to do something, we don't often just do it, we have to have a little reminder changing our behavior or overcoming negative habits is challenging. It's hard. But it's the little reminders that we want to do better. We want to be back. The side you are important enough to work on yourself with confidence is one area of your life where you need right now. and develop that confidence. One day at a time. You deserve that you are writing the script, you are creating your own movie, show up and be the star in your own show. Don't let other strategy. Don't let others be the star of your show. Start building your own competence today. And be who you want to be walking in the grocery store today. Saying hello to a stranger on the street. shaking hands with more powerful eye contact will help you grow. Those are the little things that will get you where you need to go. And if it's skill you need to start studying, start practicing. Talk to people. Today I'm going to be more confident it begins with you and say how your day goes. I bet you pursue things that are truly important to you and things will start aligning with you while you're trying to work on that. If they're that important to you, they will start showing up for you opportunities. We think that we lose competence, we think that it goes away but after we've done something we just build on it. It's like riding a bike. As a kid we learn how to ride a bike and then you know it's The most important thing on our mind, you can probably see that in your kids like they were my four year old Lord have a lot of those training wheels, he was up at 630 in the morning, and he went directly outside, put his helmet on and wanted to ride, he wanted to build that skill, we have to remember that it's like that for adults as well. You just have to get back on the bike. It's there, we remember, and then you build on it. What I bought my bike for travel on, you know, deciding to do the triathlon was the easy part. Deciding to do the 180 kilometers of biking was the hard part because I didn't own a bike. I hadn't been bike on a bike for, gosh, 1520 years? How is I going to clip my feet in this bike and stay on it for 180 kilometers? How is I going to ride my bike for six hours. And I just had to get on a start learning. And you know what happened? The first day I got on my bike, I clip my feet in and I fell over. This is a learning experience. You look around to see if anybody's looking. Nobody's around. Just me and my own embarrassment. And I guess at the moment, I still remember, I'm glad that happened right here right now instead of while I was riding my bike, or while something serious could have happened, I just fell over hit my knee. It's part of the process of you know how to learn to take your feet out of the clips. That's the lesson. We learned those things as we go, even as adults, if you try, if you want something have to show up and try when we try those competence. So if it's applying to a job, and you keep hearing, no, that's gonna break us down. But for all those knows, one person's gonna say yes. And it's going to be the moment that it aligns with you the most that job aligns with you the most, because you're going after the thing that's on your heart. And it's maybe the little lesson that you're building in all those knows to get right,