May 12, 2022

You Never Know What Someone Else Is Going Through

You Never Know What Someone Else Is Going Through

Episode Summary

In this episode, Ian delineates that you can never completely understand what someone else is going through,  that you can become preoccupied with the consequences for yourselves, and that you need to figure out how to modify that behaviour.

Don’t miss:

  • Ian discusses how someone can behave in an unbelievable manner and cause you significant distress. 
  • Ian also talks through why you have to remind yourself to be more compassionate and understanding, and the significant effect it has on others versus on you. 
  • Ian explains that having the fortitude to accept full responsibility means there are external variables that make it seem as if they are the source of your sorrow.


About the Host:


Ian Hawkins is the Founder and Host of The Grief Code. Dealing with grief firsthand with the passing of his father back in 2005 planted the seed in Ian to discover what personal freedom and legacy truly are. This experience was the start of his journey to healing the unresolved and unknown grief that was negatively impacting every area of his life. Leaning into his own intuition led him to leave corporate and follow his purpose of creating connections for himself and others. 


The Grief Code is a divinely guided process that enables every living person to uncover their unresolved and unknown grief and dramatically change their lives and the lives of those they love. Thousands of people have now moved from loss to light following this exact process. 


Check Me Out On:

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LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ianhawkinscoaching/ 


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I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Grief Coach podcast, thank you so much for listening. 


Please share it with a friend or family member that you know would benefit from hearing it too. 

If you are truly ready to heal your unresolved or unknown grief, let's chat. Email me at info@ianhawkinscoaching.com


You can also stay connected with me by joining The Grief Code community at www.ianhawkinscoaching.com/thegriefcode and remember, so that I can help even more people to heal, please subscribe and leave a review on your favourite podcast platform.

Transcript

Ian Hawkins 0:02

Are you ready, ready to release internal pain, to find confidence, clarity and direction for your future, to live a life of meaning, fulfilment and contribution, to trust your intuition again, but something's been holding you back, you've come to the right place. Welcome. I'm a Ian Hawkins, the host and founder of The Grief Code podcast. Together, let's heal your unresolved or unknown grief by unlocking your grief code. As you tune into each episode, you will receive insight into your own grief, how to eliminate it, and what to do next. Before we start by one request, if any new insights or awareness land with you, during this episode, please send me an email at info at the and Hawkins coaching.com. And let me know what you found. I know the power of this work, I love to hear the impact these conversations have, okay, let's get into it.

You never know what someone else is going through, you never truly know what they're experiencing. So if a different times in your life, you've come across someone behaving in a way that you just cannot believe that is causing you great frustration. And these people are often people closest to you, maybe family members, maybe close friends. And we can get caught in thinking about the impact for ourselves. And we can find ourselves maybe getting ahead and also ahead of ourselves, why people acting a certain way. And make assumptions of what's going on for them and why they're behaving that way. But we don't really truly know what's going on for people. And everyone is experiencing some kind of grief. And everyone has some kind of unresolved grief. And always, there's always some unknown grief that's playing out below the surface that is creating a pattern of behaviour that is not helpful. And it may not be to your liking. I can guarantee whatever's going on with you from their behaviour, it's having a far bigger impact on them than it is on you. And so it's just remembering that and just keep keep reminding yourself that to be more compassionate, to be more kind to be more understanding. Because again, you don't know what's going on. You don't know how challenging their last week has been their last year, their last two years, the last minute for them. So the more we can come from that heart place, heart centred, to have more of that emotional intelligence, and show more understanding and compassion and curiosity, then we can find ways to bring more unity into our life. And ultimately, isn't that we all want to have that sense of unity with the most important people there's enough going on in the world and our life without creating divides amongst the most important people in our life. Now, the challenge is it at the same time, there might be someone in your life that's got certain behaviour that's impacting you, you've got some sort of behaviour going on that will be impacting other people as well. So while there's a certain desire within us, because of that control matrix, we've all been exposed to that that plays out how we have this need to control all the external. It's important to come back to us and our self control, and have the courage to step into our own power, have the courage to do whatever we need to do to move past whatever's keeping us stuck in the unhelpful loops that we're stuck here.

It's the most challenging, potentially, but also the most freeing thing you will ever do. To take full responsibility to have the courage to take full responsibility for what's going on. Even though there's external factors, even though there's different people in your life that may be causing you to react in a way that feels like they're causing the grief. The moment you take full responsibility for that. You take back your control, you take back your power, you get your strength, and you get to become that person who is protective of the most important people of their life in their life. provides whatever it is that they needed certain time, in the best way that you can, of course without crossing your own boundaries and being the sort of person that you want to hang around with. So at this moment, if you know there's certain things that perhaps you apologies for the alarm going off there. If you're putting that responsibility to other people that you know, you need to change that, having the courage to stand up now and say, I'm going to do things differently. I'm going to address what's going on for me. And we got to find a way to try and change that behaviour. Because when you do that, that's going to ripple out and you're going to give other people in your world permission to do this. I'll speak to you next time.

I hope you enjoyed this episode of The Grief Code podcast. Thank you so much for listening. Please share it with a friend or family member that you know would benefit from hearing it too. If you are truly ready to heal your unresolved or unknown grief, let's chat. Email me at info at Ian Hawkins coaching.com You can also stay connected with me by joining the Grief Code community at Ian Hawkins coaching.com forward slash The Grief Code and remember, so that I can help even more people to heal. Please subscribe and leave a review on your favourite podcast platform