Nov. 23, 2022

The World is My Oyster

The World is My Oyster

Episode Summary

In this deep dive into mindset, the creative power of our minds and the nature of reality, Shiraz and Kevin explore;

  • why his car broke down
  • the hidden pride that drives parents
  • how to create a different future

What we do and say as parents has significant impact on our kids - and ourselves - so the more we learn about controlling our thoughts and words, the better off we’ll all be.

About Shiraz Baboo:

Shiraz is an Award-Winning Author, International Speaker, and Reality Interventionist. He coaches people to get out of what he calls “Reality Addiction” and his book, How to Rewrite Reality has changed lives across the globe. Shiraz helps you to annihilate your unconscious addiction to stories of struggle and lack, resulting in an abundance of free time, money, and energy.

Shiraz’s gift to you

https://energeticmagic.thrivecart.com/focusaudios/

Connect with Shiraz 

https://www.shirazshifts.com/speaking/

https://www.energeticmagic.com/

Get the Book on Amazon

https://www.amazon.com/How-Rewrite-Reality-Becoming-Stories-ebook/dp/B07Y8F2J4H/ref=sr_1_1?keywords=How+to+rewrite+reality&qid=1669182115&sr=8-1

About the Host:

Married for over 22 years, and Dad to 4 young kids, Kevin is focused on helping Dads not only be the best they can be, but also leave the best for their family. He believes that everything rises and falls on leadership - and it starts on the inside. 

Behind this passion for working with Dads, is a heart that cries for the children and wives who are missing out, struggling, or worse, because the men in their lives are not sure that they have what it takes.

He knows from hard-won experience that all Dads have what it takes to provide fully and deeply what their family needs from them. “When things are looking rough,” he says, “we have to hold on to the truth that all of us are capable of far more than we realize. We can see this truth when we stand firm, and don't let the storms of life chase us away from those are counting on us.”

Kevin encourages those who engage with him to take courage, and embrace the challenge of digging deep within to see their true heart; because everything we do in life - or don’t do - stems from who we are. 

Connect with Kevin;

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Kevinwillspeak

Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/kevinwillspeak

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kevinwillspeak

To book a complimentary session with me: https://calendly.com/kevinwillspeak/freesession

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Special Thanks

This podcast was made possible by the the team at Ear Control and their Launch Your Podcast 2 Day Intensive. I am so grateful to all of them for helping me get it all together, and for their crucial role in my mission to help 1,000 men per year on the journey to building a legacy that lasts!

Transcript

Kevin Williams:

Welcome back, everybody excited to be here again. And I am really looking forward to this conversation with Shiraz, who is an award winning author, international speaker and Reality Interventionist. He coaches people to get out of what he calls reality addiction. And his book How to rewrite reality has changed lives across the globe. Shiraz helps you to annihilate your unconscious addiction to stories of struggle and lack, resulting in an abundance of free time, money and energy. I don't know that there's anything about any of that, that anybody doesn't want. I'm sure as Yeah, we we met a few weeks ago and had a brief conversation. And and just what we did get into was just, it was a great start. And so I had suggested that you come and and talk with us a bit and share. Essentially, I just wanna have a conversation with you more about all these topics of mindset, attitude, and so on. And we'll see where it goes. And I know that everything that we're going to talk about is going to be beneficial, just because of the nature of the topic. So welcome, and thanks for being here today. Really appreciate it.

Sharaz Baboo:

Thanks for having me. Glad to be here.

Kevin Williams:

So tell me briefly just to kind of give us some context where you're coming from, I'm focused on on fatherhood, and the related, everything related to that, which includes our relationship with our spouse and our kids and work, all that kind of stuff. And a lot of it revolves around mindset. What kind of got you to this place because it's not like my story where you know, fatherhood triggered a lot of the questions that I needed to be answered. For you, this is gonna be a very different journey because you don't have kids so briefly, what got you what got you to where you're at now?

Sharaz Baboo:

For me, the journey started when I was 22 years old. I was in university studying to be a doctor. I was a bodybuilder and everything was going great for me the world was my oyster. Except the world didn't give me pearls. It gave me arthritis within Once I was in intense pain and every single joint in my body, and there were nights where I would sit my dinner through a straw, because my jaw was so swollen and painful, I couldn't move it and open it enough to eat. Yeah. And this continued with my body deteriorating, I started to lose cartilage between the joints. So there'd be days where I'd be walking, and I could feel the ankle and shin bones grinding because the cartilage wasn't there anymore. And that made for a painful, very physically painful life. Yeah, yeah. And you know, you may not have been through that kind of physical pain. But have you had that situation where you've got your life plan set out and then out of nowhere, bam, it's gone? You got your left scrambling and trying to figure out what to do next. Right. Yeah. That's that's the space I was in. So going through all those emotions, the anger and frustration at first when I realized what was going to happen, but then the despair is it all set and how bad it was going to be than the the self judgment, the self pity trying to figure out what am I supposed to do with my life? What did I do to deserve this? And I got to a place where I could start to work through it and try to get out of it and I tried medication that you normally do. And the childproof caps for arthritic medicine are just evil. I just want to let you know that that's that shouldn't be a thing. But I tried supplements, I tried diets, I tried acupuncture, at some point, I yoga, someone said magnets helped with their arthritis. So we are trying all these things, nothing was working. And almost 20 years later, I met this guy that just changed my whole perception on how reality worked. So I had flown to India. And because it was India, I expected him to do some sort of laying of hands, like, Okay, we're gonna heal your chakras. And at that point, I was ready for everything. But all he did was talk to me for about two weeks. And he went through everything that was going on in my life, and he wasn't trying to solve anything is just getting information. It's like being with a psychiatrist only. There was there was no like, how does that make you feel? Kind of like, it was just this tells me more, tell me more. At the end of the two weeks, he said, Sharaz, you feel you're responsible for everyone in your life? And I said, No, I don't. And I know you don't think you do. But from everything you've told me, you've created this belief that you need to be responsible for everybody. And it started when you were eight years old. So I said, Okay, I know I'm a responsible guy. I don't think I'm responsible for everyone. That's crazy. But what's that even got to do with arthritis? I said, Oh, you don't want to be responsible for everyone. Yeah. And if you're lying in bed in pain, you don't have to be responsible for anyone. And you don't have to feel guilty about it. If people can see you're struggling just to get through the day, they're not going to ask you to take care of them. It's the solution for a problem you don't realize you have. So I said that's messed up.

Kevin Williams:

I think that'd be a common reaction. Yeah,

Sharaz Baboo:

yeah. But he said, That's what most chronic illnesses are. solutions to problems people don't realize they have.

Kevin Williams:

Wow, okay.

Sharaz Baboo:

Yeah. So, I said, Okay, well, if what you're saying is true, then all I have to do is say, I'm not going to be responsible for anyone, but knee. And the arthritis should just go away. And he looked at me, he said, Yes. If you actually believe it deep down, that you don't need to be responsible for anyone, then you don't need the arthritis. So I said, Okay, I'm not going to be responsible for anyone but me. And when I woke up the next morning, there was no pain. There was no inflammation. I had more mobility, and I couldn't even breathe, but I could take in more oxygen. So I'm freaking out, right? Like, I'm like, What the hell just happened? This doesn't happen overnight. This is crazy. But it had and there was a there was a track where I was staying. And I was on that track every day. But I was doing my old man shuffle because that's what my body was like at that point, like the 70 year old man. And I'm just trying to get her on the track and people are passing me I'm getting passed by 70 year old people. It was it was embarrassing. This particular day, I am just rounding this track. I'm passing everyone I'm trying passing people younger than me and everyone's looking at me going What the hell? And I'm like, I know right? This is amazing. And here's your crazy thing when I got home no one asked me to be responsible for them. Right because why would they? It was a belief I created when I was eight years old. So I'd be living been living in this fear of this thing all my life. And it was just a fear and nothing more and I created an endless around And the big takeaway here, when I looked into it was this isn't about illness, this is about everything. Right? Any consistent physical problem you have in your life is the solution for an emotional problem you're not looking at, because your mind would rather avoid emotional problems than physical circumstances. So get out of guilt create arthritis, right? I've had people come to me about money, I'm not making enough money. But we find out that, oh, if I make a lot of money, I might feel bad, because there's all these people struggling, and now I'm just living it large. So their shame your various like, I don't want shame. So I'll make sure I don't make money. Right. And so that's it. That's how it works. And all these these beliefs come up. And that's how we create our lives. And that's how we we create our families is how we educate our kids. Because our priority is not growth. It's safety. Right? And think about how many times you tell your kids stay safe out there. Right? But safety doesn't lead to growth. And if you're always teaching safety, you're inherently telling them be afraid there's danger out there. And so they will be like, not they'll you think they'll be on the lookout for dangerous, they'll be safe, but they'll actually be pulled towards danger, so that they confirm that they need to be safe. That's the crazy thing about how it works.

Kevin Williams:

Yeah, that sounds like that, that idea that, well, essentially, like it's that idea of what focus on is where you go like if you're here, look, I tell this to my my two oldest daughters who have recently started grinding and don't look at the place that you don't don't look at the ditch that you want to avoid. Look at the road where you want to go, don't look at the car on the side of the road that is parked, you don't want to hit look at the road next to it where you want to go. So that you go there. That sounds I mean, sounds like you're saying more or less the same principle, just on a kind of a deeper inner application, I guess.

Sharaz Baboo:

Yeah, exactly. And the big thing about this, for me was the responsibility aspect. Because for me responsibility is is a big thing. And now I teach people not to be responsible, except for themselves, including not being responsible for the kids, which freaks out a lot of parents. But responsibility is always a heavy energy. Responsibility, it always feels like a burden. So I have to be responsible for my kids, I have to take care of them, I have to make sure that they do well. As much as that sounds great and noble and wonderful. That's a heavy energy. But when you shift from responsibility to choice, I don't have to take care of my kids, but I'd love for them to prosper. So I'm going to do what I can to get them there. It it could have the exact same actions, but the energy it comes from the mindset it comes from creates a completely different result and relationship between you and your kids.

Kevin Williams:

Okay. All right, somebody this I mean, sounds like you're taking this a little further, somebody shared with me recently a similar, similar shift in wording that I could look at it as I'm not responsible for you, or whoever you is the other person, but I might be responsible to them. In other words, I've, if I've committed to doing something, then I'm responsible to, to follow through with that. But I'm not responsible for them as a person or an entity and, and their well being or whatever, but you're actually going a step further. And shifting because that's something what you described a second ago is what I've, I've been I've actually been working on this just in the last months last year, particularly a couple of years is not saying, Oh, I got to do the dishes, to wash the dishes. But oh, I get to clean up the dishes. We have these dishes, we have food, we got to have had a great meal. I get to contribute to the family life by cleaning up. And it does, ... t's interesting. We tend to think Oh, it's just words like what doesn't matter what how you say it? It's like, well, but it does, doesn't it it changes your your attitude changes your energy, how you feel about it. It's really an so small thing. effect it doesnt compared to relieving arthritis pain, but it's the same principle I guess.

Sharaz Baboo:

It is. And here's the thing, a small thing can make a huge impact in your life. And people don't get that they're looking for how do I create the big change? And you don't realize that making small changes, you got accumulation and growth in those small changes that result in the big To change,

Kevin Williams:

Right. Yeah, I think I think you're you're right on that too. Yeah, I can say that I've done that underestimated. The, one of my friends has the compounding effect of, of small steps and small actions and how that grows and becomes like a snowball is it were of growth and change.

Sharaz Baboo:

Yeah, one of my friends, I remember when he pointed out to me, he said, we've got all these movies about time travel, where they go back, and they change one little thing that is had huge repercussions when you come back to the present. But you don't think well, if I change one little thing now it's going to have huge repercussions when I move into the future.

Kevin Williams:

Yeah, fair point. That's right. Yeah. Yeah, we, I guess, we tend to look at, we want to do some big change, and we want to do it now. Which is interesting. That's another thing that I've been kind of working with on myself is just this idea that I'm trying to, .... I'm impatient, I want to see significant change today. Because, you know, I think all time is finite. And, you know, I take too long if I'm gonna miss it, whatever it might be. And so I'm trying to push for big change. But I guess through the coaching and stuff that I've been doing, I kind of began to see. Actually, if I just kind of take it easy. Not take it easy, but don't Don't be intense about seeing big change, but be patient, and diligent in the steps that are required today. And kind of let tomorrow take care of itself as it were. Yeah. Which I guess is tied into to some of what you're saying here, I guess.

Sharaz Baboo:

Yeah. Because one of the things we're taught, is you have to worry. You've got to worry about the future, you got to worry about your kids, you got to worry about your finances. And the irony is the emotional state of worry, causes things to become worse. What if you didn't worry, you can take all the exact same actions, but don't do it from a place of worry.

Kevin Williams:

Okay, here's, here's a resistance that comes to that. Okay. What you're, ... what you're suggesting here. If we're really honest about it, really puts the the word that comes to mind is responsibility. Which I suppose it's okay in this context, but it puts the responsibility on me or the onus is on me. For, well, if we if we draw this to its logical conclusion, it's pretty much everything in my life is it's, it's up to me, I'm responsible for it based on how I'm choosing to think and act. Yep. Okay, well, that sucks.

Kevin Williams:

Well, it's kind of a double edged sword, isn't it? If we like it was like, okay. Oh, great. I can create a great future. That's exciting. But essentially, the, what we're talking about here means that I'm also it's .... I don't like the word fault, but it's, it's kind of my fault, or is because of my choices that I have. Whatever is not I don't like in my life, that's, that's up to me as well.

Sharaz Baboo:

Yep. So, and this is the thing, it sucks when you first get it, but it becomes very freeing, because every great thing in your life is there because of you. And every crappy thing in your life is there because of you. And when you accept that, you realize that you're creating everything. So every great thing you're going to create will be because of you. And there's nothing outside of you, that can stop you from creating that. Because it's all because of you. As long as we think, well, it's not my fault. It's because of this person or this organization or because it rained or it's external circumstances. You don't have full power. You've given control to the rest of the world. And so you can never create exactly what you want in your life. But when you decide, oh, okay, that that happened, because I didn't want it to happen at some level. Then you can start going into self examination. Okay, what about it? What What about that happened because I didn't want to do it? So I'll give you an example. Very powerful example. Actually. My my, my roommate and I, we go to movies about once a month, and there's movie theater, three minute drive away from the place. But there's one particular month there was a 80s revival. going on at another theater was about half an hour away. And he usually drives and we said, let's go check out the movies. It was my idea. And we're heading out to his car and he goes, What are you doing? So you always drive he goes, I drive when it's two minutes, this is a half hour drive, you're gonna drive your idea, your car, the home like fine final drive. So we get into my car, we start driving five minutes into the drive, my dashboard lights up with just about every light that is possible to show on my dash. And he looks over and he's like, What is going on? I said, I don't know. But I think my car is going to explode any minute. And he's like, Okay, let's get back home. So we turn around, we get back, we make it to back to the house, we get into his car, we go to the movies, we have a great time we come back. The next day, I get my car, take it to the shop, I come back, and I say $1,000 to repair what went wrong with the car. And he looked at any checklist and goes, Wow, you really didn't want to drive to that movie did you? And I'm like, Oh my God, you're right. I so did not want to drive that I was willing to do $1,000 worth of damage to my car. Like I completely own that. Because otherwise it's just circumstance. But because I own that I've done things like gotten free upgrades on flights and had wonderful opportunities appear and suddenly got magical checks. And like, it's it's all this craziness that shows up in my life, because I'm creating everything.

Kevin Williams:

Okay. I'm glad to shared that story. Because I was just going to ask you for an extreme example. When you say everything I know in people's minds, right, okay, come on, not everything. There's some things that are beyond our control. When other people do, or, you know, a tree falling or, or the car breaking down?

Kevin Williams:

There's ... How do you? How do you how do you? Can you explain or addressed this question? Because that seems I know, to the vast majority of this is because that seems crazy. Like, how did you sitting in your car, cause it to malfunction?

Sharaz Baboo:

We affect everything around us. So there's, ... when you get down to quantum level, there have been experiments on with quantum physics about is light a wave or a particle, right? And eventually they figured out it's both. But for a while they were like, Well, is it a wave? Or is it a particle, we can't figure this out because sometimes it behaves one way it sometimes behaves another way. And they do these things called Double Slit experiments where they shine a light and there's a slit and another slit and the light goes through the two slits, and then does a pattern on the wall. And sometimes the pattern is a wave and sometimes it's particle. And they had this one experiment where I always show up as a particle every single time. And then one person says, Well, what if we're just missing the waves? And he's like, No, we did this experiment. There's only particles he goes, Yeah, but what if one of the slits is filtering out the waves. And there's actually waves there, but there's no part and only the particles are getting through and they're like, Okay, we should check for that. So they took a little detector that looks for waves, and they put it in front of one of the slits to see if there's any ways that we're not making through the slit. As soon as they did that the pattern on the wall change to waves. And they realize that when they look for waves, they get waves, when they look for particles, they get particles. And as they did more experiments like this, they also realized that in these quantum experiments, the results will change based on the scientist doing the experiment because of what that scientist unconsciously, unconsciously is anticipating to happen. So they've proven that we are affecting reality itself at a quantum level, which echoes out to this macro level the physical to create whatever we we are intending except where it creating from an unconscious level. And our conscious mind is only 5% of our thoughts unconscious is 95%. So you don't necessarily make a tree fall, but you'll time you're driving unconsciously so that that tree has fallen and it's gonna delay your trip. You'll do all these things these actions and, and actually have real world consequences like physical things like when I do group workshops. When I start to talk to people about something they don't want to talk about, the Zoom connection will start to falter. It will only be theirs and it was fine until I started talking about when we get into this touchy subject matter. And all sudden they're like I can't hear you. You're breaking up. You just froze. And the people that come to my workshops regularly they just chuckle because they know exactly what's going on because it's happened to every one of them at some point. But if you can affect the connection through zoom, and I've seen this like at hundreds of times now over the years I've been working, that if you can affect that electronic connection through zoom, you can affect the electronics in your car, you can affect other things in your life. We're all doing this.

Kevin Williams:

Okay. I, this is not for me, this is not news. I actually, like I love kind of explored a little bit into quantum physics, and I'm familiar with the experiments you're talking about. So I appreciate that explanation. So I want to, I want to kind of let that sit. Because that for a lot of people, that's a that's a big, that's a big one. That's a huge mind shift. And it's, it seems unreal, and so on. I'm not I don't at all want to take away from from that. Because I what you're saying is true. Like the science experiments are real. They, this is all this is all real. But I'd like to come back to kind of let's get back into the day to day where we're, we're walking through kind of the other part of life.

Sharaz Baboo:

Yeah. So bringing it back. I'll give you an example. There's one thing I hear from a lot of parents is you have to make sacrifices for your kids. Yeah. Right. It's very common. And there's, there's a mindset component to there. And it's a subtle shift can change everything for how that works. Because here's the thing, if you have to make sacrifices for your kids, there's a couple of components. Number one, is that there's no other choice, which means you have to create situations in which sacrifice is necessary, because you have to make sacrifices for your kids. The other thing is, I see a lot of parents having conversations with me and other parents about what they had to sacrifice. And there's this feeling of pride that comes up, I have to give this up for my kids, look how wonderful a parent I am. So you will actually look for ways to sacrifice to get your fix of pride of being a good parent, when you're in that story of you have to sacrifice for your kids.

Kevin Williams:

Okay, I can see that. I'm trying to I'm trying to think of examples to to solidify that, I get the logic of what you're saying.

Sharaz Baboo:

I've had several friends and different clients, well, you know, I can't go after the things I want really not at all anymore. Because I need to worry about my kids, I need to focus on their education, their their possibility. So I've got to sacrifice my life's ambitions. But it could be something smaller, like, well, I just can't go to those meetings anymore with my friends, because I got to take care of the kids, I got to make that sacrifice. Right. Right?

Kevin Williams:

So a specific example for me, I guess, is this idea of entertaining our kids, and also keeping them busy and active with things. Like when I was a kid, I was bored. And but I was never bored for long, mom would say get out of the house. We live on a farm, which doesn't matter much, but for this point, but it's like, just get outside get my hair, your your whining and complaining, go play. And so we just had to go out and we go out and we wander around and kick the grass and I'm bored, what are we gonna do? You know, and then you'd see something, and you start playing with it and doing it and I had siblings so that you know, we would start doing stuff together because you don't really want to be bored. So you just find something to do. Because you're out there, you got to do something. And then you start having fun. Next thing you know, she's trying to drag you away from your fun to come in and have dinner. So as as a parent, you know, my wife, and I've struggled with this idea that we need to keep our kids entertained, because don't they whine and complain. And that bugs us, we don't want to hear the whining. So we come up with ways to entertain them. And it's weird that I do this, because it's not the way I was raised. But so so that's, that's a pretty ... to me, that's a clear example of I am, I'm occupying my time, coming up with ways for my kids to be busy and entertained with whatever it might be. When I know from my own experience, if I just let them be bored and tell them just go somewhere else and be bored and don't bug me, then they will actually find ways to entertain themselves. And and I guess what I love about that, additionally is that it stimulates their creativity and gets them moving. So yeah, I'm making my life more difficult when I don't have to because I'm believing this idea that I have to do this.

Sharaz Baboo:

Yep. And that's it. You believe you have to do that you're responsible for their entertainment. And part of you when you see that they're entertained. It goes into this feeling. And it's, it may not be conscious, but it definitely be their subconscious. Look how happy I've made my kids. This is because of me. Consciously, it could just be a frustration. It's like, Oh, I gotta do this again. And they never seem to educate themselves about me, I gotta do it again. But unconsciously, it's like, wow, look at me making my kids happy. I'm such a good parent.

Kevin Williams:

Yeah, and it can be hard to see. But I think if I, you know, as I think about various occasions, as a dad, I, there's times where I think in the back of my mind, or my subconscious, there is that sense that, Oh, good. I'm being a good parent, my kids are, are doing these activities, and they're not sitting around bored and whining. I'm not usually aware of that, as you're suggesting. But I think, yeah, put a little thought into that I can. I can, I can see that that's there. Yeah. Well,

Sharaz Baboo:

And this is it when you when you shift the mindset, and it's things like I don't need to sacrifice my kids, I'm willing to, but I don't need to, then different possibilities, start showing up situations where no sacrifice is necessary, and everyone's happy, and everyone gains are now possible, because you don't need to sacrifice for your kids. Yeah.

Kevin Williams:

And now, where you described for us, you know, in your, your, your core story there of going to India? I was gonna say it was, well, it was pretty fast if they you spent two weeks talking. And then there was a dramatic, overnight shift in your experience. I mean, it was still two weeks, but even that can be pretty quick for for us to experience change. Do you find that in your life, as an example, some things take longer than others? Or do you find you're now at a point where you make changes? Pretty darn quick most of the time?

Sharaz Baboo:

It's, it's a mixture. So one thing I've learned is, you have to be willing to go through the journey. And but most people want the miracles, right? But if all you're looking for is the miracles you don't get either, if you're willing to go through the journey, you get miracles along the way. Okay. So, yeah, so that's what I look for. And I get I get miracles all the time, but then there's an overall journey I'm going through.

Kevin Williams:

Right, so how do we, ... do you have suggestions or ideas on how do we shift? How do we begin to ship because, as I said before, for most of us, I mean, nevermind, you know, sort of breaking down our own car, but even just sort of mind shifts, like things that I'm just we're talking about in terms of responsibility for our kids? Where do we start to, to begin to make those changes in our thinking, because this is, I mean, I'm 55, I've got some 55 year old thought habits that have been going a long time. And the story in my head is 55 years or habits gonna take a while to undo. So, but where do you suggest people start that journey of shifting mindset,

Sharaz Baboo:

So, number one, start becoming aware of what you're saying. Because your stories usually come out of your mouth, you don't realize it. And listen to what other people are saying you're going to hear their stories. So if whenever you say things like, oh, this always happens, that's a story. It doesn't always have to happen. Right? But you've decided it's always happens if you say things like, I've got to sacrifice my kids. That's our story you're creating, you're actively creating in your life. And when you start to hear yourself saying different things, like, things always go so well for me, and my kids, and I get along great all the time, then those start to become the predominant stories in your life. Now, it's hard, if it's not, ...if it's the opposite, to start saying that and go that way, like people do affirmations. If the affirmations are on the opposite side, the story is not going to change is too much of a jump. But if you can start doing expressions and words that shift slowly, your brain will take that in and start making those adjustments. So number one, is that awareness. What am I saying? What am I doing? What am I complaining about? Those are all stories you're actively creating, even if you don't like them, because you keep saying them over and over and over again. That's the indicator. The other thing is any consistent physical problem, like I said, is the solution for an emotional problem you're not seeing. And when you start to when you get that and say, what's the stuff that's happening over and over that I don't like? You want to start asking not why does this keep happening to me, but why do I want this to happen? What am I worried about will happen if this stops because sometimes it's something on the other side of it that you like, Oh, no. All right. So for me with the arthritis if the arthritis was to go away, suddenly I have to be responsible for everyone and I know I can't. So there's all this guilt. So that was what was going on under the surface.

Kevin Williams:

So when you say any persistent physical issue, you're not just talking about our bodies you're talking about in the physical realm of circumstances and, and whatever else,

Sharaz Baboo:

Your finances, your relationships, meet just hardships, you've got to go through all of that if it's consistent, it's a solution. It's not a problem.

Kevin Williams:

Looked at the right way. Yes. Okay. So we start with awareness of thoughts, and stories, and then looking at any persistent circumstances. And, and then beginning to shift, how we look at that, explore that, basically, to see what's the ... what it's the solution to? Yes. Okay.

Sharaz Baboo:

So the next part is where it's part of the journey, and you have to be willing to do the work is, in order to change your circumstances, rewire the neurons in your brain, you have to be able to hold a thought for at least 30 seconds on something. That's how long it takes for rewiring to process to start. And most people can hold a thought for less than seven seconds. Right. So I actually do mental exercises, I have a downloadable that people listen to, that teaches you how to hold a thought. And the interesting thing is, there's different ones that are different lengths. And the shortest one is two minutes, because you don't require an hour to learn how to think for more than 30 seconds, you can do that in two minutes. So doing this doesn't have to take a lot of time out of your day. But you have to do it daily. Because it's like going to the gym, you you can't expect to build a body builders body, if you're going to the gym once a month. And I'm not saying I'm going all day, once a month, like that's not going to work. But if you're doing consistent work every day, you're gonna start to see changes, and then you can build on those changes. Right?

Kevin Williams:

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, that makes sense when you look at it that way, because you're building the habit. And again, I guess that comes back to the small steps that compound and build over time.

Sharaz Baboo:

Yep. Cool. So I've been doing these exercises since 2006. And one thing people have commented multiple times, is Sharaz, you're always so calm. And in the midst of chaos, you're still calm, nothing seems to faze you. And it's because the byproduct of doing these exercises, is you stay present, you stay calm and focused. So all this crap can go on around. Okay, so this is happening, not oh my god, what the hell is going on? This is crazy. And the answer, that's the byproduct like, if nothing else, you get that out of doing the mental exercises. But by doing the mental exercise, I'm like, I've created stories of things like, everything just works out. And one was, if any big financial problems shows up in my life, a bigger solution always shows up to fix it. So I always end up with more if suddenly I'm like, Oh my God, I've got a 3000 bill I didn't expect, then something like a $5,000 opportunity shows up. So it's not like I look for the bad things to come up. But if they do, I'm like, Oh, I wonder how this is going to resolve itself. I don't have to go into a panic anymore. Right. And the same thing with my relationships, my relationships are always getting deeper and more heartfelt. And I say I love you to more people in my life than I ever had.

Kevin Williams:

That's cool. That's an interesting just that you're sharing the last couple of points there. It took me back to as, as listeners who have been following with know, my family that were in a collision six years ago, just over six years ago. And one of the things that my wife said very early on, was like this is huge. All six of us were in the truck in your head head on. It's been huge. And she's but she said early on this is really huge. If and I forget exactly how she worded it but it's essentially saying what you were describing it this is such a big problem then coming from our great faith perspective said God's got something really big on the other side of this tragedy this big means some kind of huge wonder benefit or something blessing coming out of this down the road. So that kind of attitude was was with us in the beginning. That of looking for the good. And what can come out of this as opposed to oh, this is it. We're done. This is gonna be awful.

Sharaz Baboo:

Yeah, and that's it. She's she's got it too because it's not, I gotta find some way to get good out of this. So this expectation if this is this huge, there's going to be this this almost the shorty to it. If it's this big, there's gonna be something amazing at the end of it. Yeah. Yeah.

Kevin Williams:

Yeah, for sure. Wow. Awesome. I really enjoyed this as I as expected. And I really appreciate hearing more in depth, I'm so glad that we actually did this. It was kind of a crazy moment a few weeks ago when we were thrown together in a in a breakout room. But I'm really, really glad that we had this conversation and, and all the great thoughts that have come through this. As we wrap up up, I do want to give you a chance to share a little bit more and I want people to be able to, to take advantage of what you have to offer, which is part of what I want to do through this podcast is bringing more resources to people. And I think you have some great resources to share. So I want to get to that. Just before we do, we're going to shift a little and go into it's become a regular thing now with this. We'll do some rapid questions here as quick answers and silly. Not silly, necessarily, but random questions that have nothing to do with anything except my curious mind. Okay. Starting off with an easy one, what's your favorite meal?

Sharaz Baboo:

favorite meal? Mashed potatoes. Do you mean the full meal?

Kevin Williams:

If mashed potatoes is the favorite thing then that's what it is.

Sharaz Baboo:

That's what came up.I could have mashed potatoes with any meal and I love it.

Kevin Williams:

Who is somebody that you have not met yet that you would really like to meet?

Sharaz Baboo:

Not met that I would love to me? Does he have to be alive?

Kevin Williams:

Well, I guess depends how you think you'll meet them.

Sharaz Baboo:

But actually, you know what popped into my head was Keanue Reeves.

Kevin Williams:

Okay. Yeah. I think I wouldn't mind meeting him to also,

Sharaz Baboo:

Everyone says how amazing a person he is and how laid back and caring is and I'd love to, I'd love to meet him in person.

Kevin Williams:

I've heard that too. I haven't heard anything really bad about him. Can you tell us why Iceland is green and Greenland is covered in ice?

Sharaz Baboo:

Oh, absolutely. Because it was the whole marketing thing. They wanted people to get to Greenland. And so they called it Greenland. Just to make sure people would go there.

Kevin Williams:

All right. That's the best answer I've heard. Yeah.

Sharaz Baboo:

That's what I heard. I learned in history class in high school. That was it.

Kevin Williams:

That was a real thing. Yeah. All right. I had not heard that yet. When was your first kiss?

Sharaz Baboo:

First kiss was high school. Probably if I remember. Right. I was 17.

Kevin Williams:

And can you name seven wonders of the world?

Sharaz Baboo:

No. I can name some of them, hanging gardens. Great Wall Niagara Falls? Parthenon? Mount Rushmore. And I'm stuck there.

Kevin Williams:

That's more than anyone else has answered. And more than I knew. Well, thanks for that. So you wanted to kind of let you share some resources. And of course, we'll put the links in the show notes for people to follow up in terms of reaching you. So I just want to give you a minute to share what it is that you would like to people to how they'd like them to connect with you

Sharaz Baboo:

So we're gonna drop the meditations that I mentioned, the audios, which you can listen to it's 30 minutes, five minutes and 12 minutes. And the cool thing is you can sit down and just do it like a meditation. But you can also do it while you're out for a walk. Or while you're doing the dishes. It doesn't have to interfere with your life, because it's all about focusing and holding a thought. So we're going to drop those in and we'll drop a link to go to Amazon to get "How to Rewrite Reality" if you want to buy the book.

Kevin Williams:

Awesome. Well, again, really appreciate it and looking forward to connecting with you again in the future. And I really want to encourage everybody to take advantage of these offerings that Shiraz is giving. I have been learning about this myself and recognize a lot of the power of what we're thinking and how we're thinking and the stories we're telling ourselves and for my wife and I both it's been part of our healing journey to recognize the stories and the impact they have. So I can attest to that from my own experience and learnings. And again, everybody just thanks again for sharing this and if you know anybody who could benefit from would enjoy this conversation, please share the podcast with them. And if you haven't yet, please give us a like review and subscribe. So that that will help our presence on the podcast platforms and more people can hear about what we're doing here and benefit from all these offerings that our guests are sharing. Thank you all again very much. And I look forward to talking to you again soon. Bye for now.