Love Creates Love!

Welcome back to the doctor body mind soul podcast. My name is Dr. Jude. And this is a podcast which explores how we can integrate modern medicine and alternative therapies to help you get the holistic health care that you deserve. I will be speaking to healers and seekers, researchers and authors who will share their experiences and the evidence to help guide us all to Holistic Health. Let's do this. Okay, Gayle is an author, a teacher and the founder of blossom and Berry, an organization to teach love to parents and babies across the world through baby massage and yoga. Because love creates love. Gayle, welcome.

Welcome, welcome. It's fantastic to be here. So excited.

It's really exciting. It's really exciting. And it's, it's such a beautiful line to lead your business from love creates love. I mean, on the surface of it, it seems obvious. But can you explain why this is so important and how you teach it?

Absolutely. So love does indeed create love. And this was a beautiful mantra, it was actually gifted to me by one of my business partners in Italy, when I made a very spontaneous decision to follow little synchronicities and set up a training in Italy for the very first time. And I was gifted with this wonderful, wonderful teacher. So my business partner, Christina and I flew to Italy with very little preparation, and arrived at a shoe yoga studio there. And on the ball was this mantra love creates love. And as soon as I saw those words, it was like, that's it. That is what I'm teaching. That is what baby massage and baby yoga classes or safe space, safe spaces for parents and babies are all about is cultivating a sense of love, amplifying love in each other. Through that sensation and feeling and experience as love, we expand. And I believe it, it creates that that natural instinct to create more, more joy, more expansion, more freedom, more acceptance, more trust, more kindness, more compassion, however you want to label love. But when we feel it in our body, we have a sense of expansion or creation, which then creates more love. And so that's really what's been at the heart of loss from Barry, it started off with me loving my daughter who brought blossom and berry to me and activated me. So I would start teaching baby massage and yoga. And then it's been amplified through building my community of over 2000 teachers across the world who also teach love. And so love is being created in all times and all spaces all over the world without me really aware of that. So he's so powerful without actually saying it now it's made me realize, well, you know, it is it is a very powerful, powerful force in the world.

Well, you are a very powerful force. And, you know, I'm just struck by I think we can get a little bit distracted, perhaps at what some of these classes like a yoga Baby Class, a baby yoga class, I should say, or a massage class on getting it right. And you know, and ensuring you know that, you know, the specifics in a way, but what I'm really hearing that all the yoga and the massage are doing is creating a safe space for a connection to develop. And through that connection, and embodiment and experience of love being given and received.

You should come and be my copywriter. You just totally nailed it. Yes, no. I mean, what, for many, many years, I said I teach baby massage and yoga. And of course, there are many documented benefits baby massage and yoga, loads of science, loads of research, from epigenetics, neuroscience, early childhood development, attachment theory. So there's plenty of science to support it. And you know, I am a real mix of science and whoo, I love both. And for me, they give me the holistic view of what it is I'm talking about. And it gives me the confidence to come from a quantitative point of view, but also understand intuitively the quality of like, you know, effects of doing it. So there was plenty of so for a long time I talked about teaching baby massage and yoga. And I was very much sort of in that more masculine science frame. And then like I said, literally, when I went to Italy, something sort of happens. And I suddenly became aware that baby massage puts love into action. Because as a parent, we read about all the things that we should in inverted commas be doing to create a bond to create attachment. But actually, we're all in our heads, we're thinking about it, you know, we're, we're planning, we're strategizing, we're expecting that if we do this, then our babies will do that. Whereas what baby massage does is it brings you into the present moment where you actually connect with your baby and you meet your baby where they are, you witness them in their wholeness with whatever they need, at that point, without judgement of yourself or your baby. And you simply be, you know, rather than doing the baby massage with your baby, you are being with your baby in that space, connecting through your body, through your hands through your heart to baby through their felt senses, which directly communicates love into their body as a feeling as a sensation, that nothing else in terms of baby's development can communicate that you know, no eautiful, nursery Nuro, no amazing pram, no, fantastic, cute little outfit. Yes, I know, as parents, we love all of that stuff. And there's nothing wrong with celebrating your baby and having fun and enjoyment around all of these things. But if we were stripping it back to how we communicate love to babies is through their felt senses it's through touch is through movement is through presence is through eye contact is through singing, all of the things that humans throughout time and all traditions and all cultures recognize as community building connection established, establishing hardwired activities into our brain that we search out and seek, you know, dance, music, breath, eye contact, touch all of these things. And somewhere in the roundabout the sort of 70s we lost this a little bit when parenting wasn't quite so structured. And it was all sort of routine based. And we were doing a lot of much more of a masculine sort of paradigm about fixing babies or root getting babies to feed on X number of hours in between and sleeping X number of hours through the night. And disregarding the fact that babies are humans, every single one is different, you weren't I wouldn't expect you to sleep at the same time as me or eat at the same time as me or go to the toilet at the same time as me. And yet, with babies, there's a whole kind of vanilla flavoring of babies not realizing that they're actually individual humans. And you know, one size does not fit all babies in the same way that it doesn't fit. Adults. You know,

there's much I could talk about this I have a whole concept of blossom and berry called 100% Love which is all about the fact that when babies are born, they come may come in as 100% Love you know, they're they're don't have any sense of not being entirely perfect and worthy to receive. In fact, they just trust that all their needs will be met. And then slowly, through projections from society, from communities, from families, from parents, individual parents, unintentionally, completely unintentionally. You know, you're born you're like Hamas is a baby way, if ever, do they weigh too much or too little? Okay, let's go down to 99%. How much are they feeding? They fed now? Are they breastfeeding, they're not feeding. Okay, let's go down another percentage. And literally, throughout our lives, if we're not careful, we're depleting that stay of pureness perfection, 100% love through every expectation that is applied to us from outside. So part of what blossom and berry does is create a space where you can just step back and go, I made a baby. I made a human. And this is amazing and incredible. And I've got this opportunity to leave my baby and be with my baby and guide my baby, another human soul. I mean, what our responsibility, what a joy. Rather than feeling like you're constantly failing, or that you can't measure up to an expectation of society, or motherhood, or fatherhood or whatever. So

for quite very different decades, at least, it seems as though there's been a conditioning in the way that parents have been taught to parent and that sort of the experience of the love that their children are appearance. And so it goes has, I guess received has been really impacted how then We love ourselves and then are able to love our babies.

Yeah, which is why it's love creates love. Because this is our chance to heal intergenerational trauma, that is correct. Because you know, you can't blame your parents, you might want to blame your parents, you can't blame your parents, because they are a product of a society at a certain time, where they would have believed or know that that was the best thing for their baby, or just within themselves, even if they weren't listening to cultural kind of guidance on what you should be doing. Everyone's just doing the best they can at that point, there's no point in blaming or shaming or judging or really kind of carrying that with you because it is in within you. And then as you parent that's going to show up, and then you can either project that into the next generation and may can carry that all we can become just more mindful of that and actually allow our babies to heal us in we get a choice, when we were met with those triggers. Do I go oh, you know, go into that pattern, which won't just be you know, turning up in parenting, it will be everywhere, be in every relationship with your business, or your relationships with your, with your, your intimate relationships, your parents, your friendships, whatever, we can't detach from, you know, everywhere you go, there you are, yeah, you know, so we get, we can actually see babies as these beautiful kind of healers for us. And yet, we see the magic in babies, and then we try to squeeze it into a box that is called a good baby. And therefore we're just we're not progressing. With that expansion. We're either pausing staying as we are, or amplifying the past, again, into the future. So it's so important, this work is so much more than just a baby class, you know, and this is why, you know, my teachers are absolutely incredible. And I love each and every one of them, because they've helped me to put this message out into the world in a way that if I had taught locally, maybe I would have reached over the last 20 years, maybe, I don't know, 2000 parents and babies or something like that. But you know, a rough climate estimate across the board in blossom, and berry over the last 20 years, we've probably touched the lives of over half a million babies. And it's definitely my intention over my lifetime for it to be millions, for sure. So either this is where the work is, this is where the power is. And, you know, unfortunately, in society, the value of parenting and caring is very, very low, it's not seen, in the same way as say, money working with money, or property or any of those things. You know, this is the future that we're holding in our arms across the nation across the world. And everything that we're doing is shaping the future leaders in the future members of society, so powerful to value the village value, the you know, the family. And, you know, the main challenge there is that the parents themselves don't have a lot of support. And so, you know, as you said, you have to muster up what the love what love you have inside of you, which for every person could be, you know, you could be on 2% Love, you came in at 100. But because of what happened, you're on treatment. So where to find the capacity to love another is hard, which is why Yeah, the village is so important, but not always present. You know,

I mean, this is such deep work. Yeah, I mean, you're you're teaching you're teaching love. And I often I sort of, I really see a parallel with the healthcare work that I'm doing in a&e, and in our hospitals, like with the staff, and our nursing staff, and and medical staff, you know, this is a caring present profession that we all went into, we all wanted to care for our patients, but the conditions through which we are being made to work make that really difficult to to give and receive and there's something being really last in the in the in the relationship that that we can have with our patients, which affects the love and the care that we can both give and receive. And so I'm really noticed a parallel, a parallel there. We have to feel cared for in order to care for others. We have to experience the care what it feels like to feel cared for to know how nourishing that feels and how important that is. So we can and want to pass that on. And I guess it's a very similar thing to what you're saying around love, but we have to learn sometimes what it feels like to receive that love to be able to

give it. Absolutely. You know, it's like, you know, when I first thought, well, I sort of had this kind of I was like a kind of channeled message at about 100% love for babies, like I have very strange connection with my work where I just received the sort of guidance of what to talk about and 100% love to babies just came to me, you know, like, you know, when you're just staring out the window was like, oh, that's what it is, you know. And one of the things I was worried about talking about 100% off for babies, is it does it actually then make parents feel like, oh, no, I've got to, I've got to love my baby 100%, which means there's no room for when I don't want to love my baby, because I need to love myself or my baby's triggering me and I'm actually not feeling very loving towards my baby right now. And what I didn't want is to with the message of 100% love to make to make people feel that they have to suppress emotions other than love. The thing is, Love is everything. Love is the the feelings that you have of anger or shame or exhaustion or fatigue or dislike that those are to honor those feelings is love for yourself is the noticing of that, and loving yourself through the fact that that's okay to have those feelings as a parent. So 100% love for babies is 100% love for parents. And 100% love for yourself is not just loving yourself when everything's happy. Yeah, brilliant. And yeah, I'm nailing it. And all of this is loving yourself in the same way when you see your child cry, if you need to cry, can you hold yourself? Can you love yourself, because you are also an infinite source of your own love. So I really want you know, I've sort of created a really kind of narrative around it and a beautiful video to just explain to parents that 100% love for babies is 100% love for you. And it means 100% fit love for you in every aspect of you. And that's the light and the dark or the you know, whatever you want to identify as there's no, there's no such thing as you know, good parenting or bad parenting, it's just the meaning that we attach to it, you know, we can only be the version of the parent that we are at that moment. And we can always probably do more. But we could also do less, we're just what we just we just meet ourselves where we are. And we're just like, Okay, this is an experience.

And the more we learn to do that with ourselves, the more we are able the the more our children can see that that's what we're doing. And therefore they are learning that the light and the dark within them is all okay, acceptable and lovable, and they are fully lovable as themselves.

Exactly. That's self love, isn't it, I mean, self love is not just loving yourself when everything's going right love, you know, it's is having the compassion and kindness for yourself to to hold yourself in those moments. And I think it's really important to model that children. And there's a great concept called rupture and repair, which is really useful to share with parents, which is, you know, at some point, you know, you are going to probably get triggered by your baby your child, you're not probably most likely. And that's okay. You know, that's okay to have the rupture. Because there's something within you that needs to be expressed, then you can step back and you can respond to yourself, give yourself what you need, whether you need to some space to breathe, you need to scream, you need to call a friend, whatever it is. And then you just come back and you repair it and you just say, you just offer your baby what they need, when you have the capacity. If you're if your child is old enough to understand, you can say yeah, I'm sorry, you know, and that is modeling to your child how to have a much more conscious relationship with yourself and other people. And it doesn't, it's not perfect, you know, perfect as we all walk around all the time, you know, perfectly respecting everyone's boundaries and being all love and light. Like, I don't know, any humans. It's, you know, the human experience is a messy one of growth and learning that just allows our kind of soul if you like to, to evolve. And if, again, if we start teaching this and modeling this and embodying ever to children, we've probably got a chance of having less mental health issues where people are feeling all the time that they're failing. They're not good enough. They've got low self worth. or the idea that success is something outside of yourself, which also can activate mental health problems because you feel like you're never there, wherever there is. So, you know, this work at the beginning of life, it's the first 1001 days of life from conception to two, again, loads and loads of research. If you're a geek like me, you can get seriously into this and lose yourself for a good time, which I love. You know, so much yummy stuff about epigenetic genetics, which I could bore go on another whole podcast episode with you just on that, because it's so incredible. And we now know that you know, nurture is more important than nature, we nature is about 10 to 20% of their nurture is about 80% of it, which is why you know, what we are doing, and blossom and Berry is transformational, because we're actually holding the 80% where we were, we're modeling that in our groups, because in our groups, you're safe to be seen heard, you're accepted, you belong, we're compassionate, we're kind, you know, all of those things. So if you are being held in that way, then you have the capacity to hold yourself and hold your baby. And then babies grow to understand that this is how we can be together, you know, in a space, like authentically present connected. So yeah, so this is your probably realized now, this is why I've been doing it for 20 years, because it's not going away. And every moment I think to ourselves, there's babies being born, there's babies being born, gotta get busy. Gotta get busy, because you know, this is for me, it's like, you know, ring the bell. This is a national emergency, we've got 1001 days to save the world. Yeah, this is the critical window.

Everything every day, there's another the clock starts again. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. And it is really important work. Because we're never actually we're not taught this stuff. We're not taught. We're not taught love. I mean, I don't know if you know this about me, I went to I went to relationship school for two years and in Colorado to, to study the deep psychology of intimate relationships. Because we're not, you know, we're not taught love, like, we're not taught how to love. And so I can really see the parallel here, but actually, just like things stop, this is a really important skill to learn. And we're not being taught it in our national school curriculum. You know, instead, we're being taught math. I mean, it's, it seems crazy, seems really crazy. What do you think, will be a quick win? For anyone listening to this podcast? I guess I'm trying to think, is there a way that you couldn't? I guess we've got a mixture of parents and non parents here, like, what what can you give us to sort of experience more love in our, in any one of our lives, through what you've learned?

I'd say like the number one thing that see, the easiest way to implement love is presence. So that's whatever brings you into the present moment, I feel that it's love. Because whatever brings you into the present moment, opens your heart. And that's where you access love from him. From my understanding, that's just my personal belief and experience. So when you're not present in your body, when you're not present in the moment, you're not living, because you're not here, you're you're either in the past or the future. So presence, cultivating a sense of presence, it's that easy. You know, it's that easy to show your baby you love them by just turning off your phone, you know, shutting the door, and just really giving your baby their your undivided attention. And you're channeling your, you know, the greatest gift you can give is the presence to another person because in that moment, you have pure connection between you and another, you know, you're truly seen and heard, there's intimacy, you know, into me, you see, you know, that that is that's what it is for me. So my tip would be for love for yourself, find whatever brings you into a state of deep presence, you know, whether it's music, dance, nature, drawing, you know, like flow state, you know, I love in flow state, you know, whatever, whatever that is, and with your baby or your child is genuinely genuinely and I think phones are here to destroy that. You know, to put your phone away when you're around your child, even when my teenage children I try not to have my phone, you know, near me because, you know, I want to be present with them. My phones away if my phones there, I'm distracted. I'm not present. So I'm not fully connecting. So yeah, that would be II Obeah I love

that the biggest present is presence. That's what biggest gift, the biggest can give us is our presence. That's so true. seems so simple. And yet so and you're right, I think in this current, day and age, we're a DNA of total distraction, it can be really hard to imagine just switching that all off just to give someone their direct presence. But that's so rich. And so, such an act of love. It's such an act of love. And I mean, you through blossom and berry you have you sort of briefly alluded to it before, but I mean, you've trained over 2000 facilitators who are delivering this work across the world. And now you, you are actually teaching how to other heart led entrepreneurs as yourself, build their communities and spread their Heartland message. I mean, I don't even know where to start with what you want to share with what you've got going on. Because I can't even imagine what that what that is right now. But what, what, what, what, what feels most present, I guess, for you right now, in this moment, to share with what is going on in the world of blossom and Berry.

So, I mean, I think I've been in Glastonbury now for 20 years, I've now attracting other leaders have found leaders who want to scale the way that I have, like scale, their their impact, and their income as well, for what they're giving they, you know, they're open to receive for that. So yeah, so in the last sort of couple of years, I've been doing mentoring for kind of leaders, and now I've created the love millions Academy, which is my way to impact millions of people through supporting leaders in their leadership. So the kind of four pillars are to love millions, so know what it is that you're here to do, what's your In essence, what is it that you love, you know, you feel that passion for that you want to share with others? And you can love millions through that women impact millions is and how do you do that? Do you train others to do it? Do you, you know, have products and services that amplify what it is that you desire in a certain way. And then receiving millions, I think is really important as well, in terms of, especially with women entrepreneurs is often lots of blocks around receiving money. And the idea, especially if you're in care, or something to you know, holistic spirituality well being that, you know, we can't receive, because this is something that we need to do of service to the planet, which of course we do. But if we don't receive for it, we're not actually able to sustainably do that over a long period of time. It's it's very important to receive millions as well. And then the last pillar is contribute millions, which is an absolute cornerstone of everything I do, I have various charitable projects across the world, because, you know, again, anyone is listening to this, he does struggle with money mindset. And working in the well being space is as you receive that you are channeling that energetic currency, if you like, into your you know, into your field, and then you get to choose yourself sovereign right to then reinvest that. And if that means that you can redirect money, those that circling around all over the place, into places where, you know, mindfully and consciously we can make a massive difference. Now, if we're not open to receive as female entrepreneurs, that money is getting trapped going around somewhere else that you you might not like that. So actually, by stepping up and being open to receive money, you become that channel for so much, so much good, you know, real incredible stuff, you know, either with your own charitable foundation if that if that's your desire, or your dream board, just simply by being a channel and letting it flow through you into other people who are dedicated and loving millions in their passion. So yes, it's a really powerful sort of concept based on my shared experience, and I think, you know, that's something that's really important to me if I do have 20 years of experience of building up my business from literally nothing, I was a lawyer working in the city had no time no money and absolutely no idea and three children under three and a half had no idea whatsoever to where I am now and that's been a journey, you know, through ups and downs and this mat and you know, all sorts of directions redirections and all of the things so I feel very grounded in my experience, my leadership and my mentorship to other women and you know, and that's what I love to do. I love I want to love millions through loving millions because love craves Love is the same thing.

I I mean, I've been, I've been nodding profusely as we've been talking about that because you know, the witchy woman has? Well, just to mention, you know, Gail is one of our witchy women, she's on the Richmond platform, it's such an honor to have her there. And on the Wichman platform, we have witchy women's wealth, and it's there for exactly the reason that you're talking about, it's because if we, when when we are consciously spending money, in the areas that we feel passionate about, supporting, supporting people that we feel, we want to support, this is a really powerful, powerful force in the world, when we're doing it with with consciousness, when we're doing with awareness, when we're doing it from from our hearts like that, we need more of this. So I'm just sort of really nodding in resonance with you, as you were speaking about that, that there are so many, any many money blocks for heart centered entrepreneurs. And we need to transform that we need to transform that narrative, like, you know, money is just an amplifier, an amplifier of the impact you want to make. And we need to make sure that as many of us really embody that, that mindset so that we can actually have a bigger impact, a bigger impact in the world. We need more heart centered entrepreneurs out there making millions and contributing millions to our economy. I mean, there's no there is not a clearer time that we that that can be demonstrated for the mess that we're in environmentally and economically right now for whoever you know, money is money is money is in the world, and it's just circulating in the wrong hands.

Yeah, absolutely. It's just redirection, you know, it's just calling calling in, you know, you exchanging what your gifts, you know, what you love. So, if we will, I mean, pick, you know, I am people, one of my ambitions is to stand on a stage and say, Listen, it's all about love, okay, you think business is about money power control, it's not, if everybody was in there is full sense of love, activating that through entrepreneurship, or businesses that are aligned and conscious, the whole entire world would be different, because every single person that you met, would be doing what they love, they be in their genius zone, you know, we would no longer be working, you know, where you'd be simply existing in an in an ideal state now, okay, that is a massive pipe dream, because you also have things like social injustice and inequity, which are not spiritually bypassing it making out you know, we all just do this, because there is some deep rooted inequalities in the world that needs to be tackled. And that's gonna take you generations and generations and generations. So I'm not saying I'm here to save the world at all, but all I'm saying is in my little bit of the world, I can do what I can to say, to share this message and embody it in that, you know, I do receive and then and then give, empower others in what they love, you know, because I'm not here. So single handedly to do this, I want to do it in collaboration, I want to, like you said, you know, investing in sustainable brands means a little person with a business somewhere or a person with a big business somewhere, is making is having more energy available to make and create more good stuff everywhere. So, yeah, it's, it's, it's magnificent, really, it's like a whole new ecosystem built on love flowing everywhere. So yeah,

and it's a real shift, it's a real shift from this patriarchal model and we have and masculine way of working and living into a feminine way of working and living and you know, the world really needs us to to step up and feminine leadership and and, and and model what is possible from that space. And it's really amazing to witness witness the shift that I do see is happening and it's it's really amazing to be part of that part of that change. So what else do I want to say relate at this be bit out Don't Don't Don't worry, don't you worry what else who wants there then that's Foucault most of actually. So Gail, if people are wanting to find out about how to access the blossom and Berry, baby massage and and yoga, where can they find where can they find you and what what what countries do you operate in?

So you can find out anything about Blossom and Berry on our website, which is Blossom and Berry.com offer have a son in stop loss, my very baby massage. We train people across the world. It doesn't matter what country you're in because we also have our well our main language is English, but we also have it in Spanish. We have it in Italian. And we're also translated into Arabic as well. So you know, we really are here for you. So you can train with us online anywhere in the world. I'm also really interested if anyone's assisting in sporting other charitable initiatives as well across the world. We have lots of free bursaries that we give out for specialized charitable projects, particularly working with vulnerable parents. So you can find out all about laufman Barry there. And then if you are a leader, and you're inspired, perhaps by what I've shared today, you can check me out at I am Gayleberry.com. And on Insta, I am Gayle Berry and yeah, that's where you can find out more about love millions Academy working with me on a one to one. Also collaborative projects that are run throughout the year retreats events are all based on amplification of your essence you know, which have come full circle, you know, 100% love. That's it. You know, whether you're a baby or whether you are a female entrepreneur leadership is still the same. It's just tapping into that 100% love essence you have fun for the reason that you're here. So